apology if I haven’t yet edited the paragraph breaks back in to the document paste


 This is to be sent by regular postal service to many folk who know me, who I have an address for.  It is therefore written with my relatives and persons who have known me for a long time in mind, but I have tried to make it accessible also for readers who have not known me for long, or who might live outside of Australia and so not understand all the Australian social conditions.  An apology if I have lost your street address and have sent it only by e-mail.  Insh Allah if you have found this in the internet, you will only need read it as might bring you peace of mind.  I have tried to make the earlier paragraphs contain information of the broader context; then the middle paragraphs have more the more detailed essential story; while most of the social analysis is towards the end; however that is not very neatly differentiated, partly because my social context has always been one in which the difficulties I am facing, had an alternative political analysis within my own comprehension, since early in my life.  That is, “alternative” to the mainstream and right wing framework of social justice; but really the position of analysing what the causes of abhorrent phenomenon such as child abuse are, and opposing the causes of those phenomenon, is one which has no real alternative for the whole society.  So while I refer to details of my own situation, I am hoping that others will also be able to extrapolate the broader social implications.

The whole is quite repetitive in form, but normally not in information content.  I am keeping the whole as it is for the time being, despite a few conclusions being repeatedly drawn, since the way those conclusions can sustain meaning for one person will be different from the way those conclusions can sustain meaning for another.  For example, reading one passage it could seem to one person that my argument is alike a racist position, but to another person the opposite, and then in a later part of the whole document, a different passage could portray the same discussion so that the two different readers can accept one another’s perspective.  However most of the repetition is because in trying to edit it, so far it just keeps getting longer, and I am being open to that process, as a way of finding out if there is any story in me not to the fore yet, but which could be beneficially told.

The content that can seem to be racist, is that which makes the argument that white folk are buying into letting black folk experience a lower set of social standards, every time we automatically assume that we have more social privilege than a black person.  Some black persons who have made a big impact in my life, had been assuming that I might be always inclined to take advantage of being white, and worse assumptions also about the fact that my biology happens to be sustained within white skin; and in opposing their position that I must be held to be in their debt, regardless of how their have behaved towards me, my description of events in my life at times can only seem to read as though racist against black persons.  Yet the reason I can make this argument, is only because I have not used my white skin to my advantage over any darker skin person.  The assumption made about me was always of theft in one way or another, and recently it resolved through myself being given a stolen gift at Christmas, which a black woman had stole with the express intention of causing me to seem to be the thief.  The fact that she had been raised to anticipate that such an assertion about me is socially respectable on her part within the white mainstream, is an indictment of how far destitute the Aboriginal Australian population are in respect of the cultural meanings of the invading culture.  The woman’s father chose to support her in her choice when he had access to plenty of money which she had asked him to provide her with for Christmas, but he instead chose to provide her with face to face access to a white person to take advantage of.  The father used his daughter to hide his own want to take advantage of white persons.  I hope that this whole document will provide some situational analysis of why that has been happening, and how we can all work towards alleviating the pressures which cause such patterns, which are, after all, far worse for the black population than the white, in the current economy.  However many black Australians have been lead to believe that such an attitude will eventually provide for them to be in the top heap in the economy.  I have evidence that they are being set up from within organised crime, but cannot here safely expose that evidence.

Today I am typing a draft of this for an internet weblog site also, but it will not be put into the public domain until after a full copy is sent to my family; who will need to know that this information is being made into a form which is accessible for many persons.  The letter which is being sent to some among my friends, family, and acquaintances, will be excluding only those whom I know have work requirements for ASIO security clearance.  This speaks to my immediate need to be writing this. The most significant matter I am addressing is about how I have been getting policed.  The whole document tells many aspects of my own life story in brief, and about my concerns with the present legal situation with respect to the family court process, but also makes some way of an analysis of how the policing of law and order is being undermined by some police methods being potentially causal to criminality. 

To the best of my knowledge the police have me under suspicion as a potential terrorist, and are inclined to suppose that some of my writing might prove to be seditious.  They have particular concerns about why some black Aboriginal persons have been upset with me around me acquiring knowledge which they had believed was only for black skin persons to be privy to.  The specific knowledge however, is hardly seditious, and turns out to have been only the full story behind the Sugar Glider Dreaming from local to my own birth place; but it had happened that I acquired the story within Traditional Aboriginal method, and then later learned that one aspect of the Sugar Glider Dreaming cycle is being used by black men in prison as a method of sustaining the sanctity of their personal integrity in conditions which are an abuse of human rights.  The Aboriginal community had been anticipating that it would prove to be a black girl who first realised the whole story.  Regardless of which there is hardly a threat to national security in the fact that I know a good yarn about a sugar glider, and recognise how the whole story about sugar gliders can be used to sustain mental health in an incarcerated population.  Eventually it is my hope that some of my writing might become made available to the prison population through their own internet forum, which is very heavily policed, so I am hardly likely to be trying to write material which will not be able to be published.

I need to let you all know from my own perspective, why it has been happening that I am under a high level of police scrutiny.  In this document I am anticipating what sort of questions might be arising among all of my acquaintances, and attempting to answer.   Immediately I need to be addressing my relatives most of whom have not heard from me for a long time, but I find that I cannot commence describing the situation, without also providing some of my own social analysis of the framework of policing.  My mother had informed me that nobody wants to receive any communications from me, so I can assure you up front that I am not trying to ask anything of anybody, except that you are attentive to your own interests in what I am addressing.  However, I can also inform you that my mother is somewhat misguided about my life, and I trust that my extended family, and others who know my mother, will be readily able to realise that short of letting me tell my own side of the story, you will never know the truth.  I am quite sure that my mother is not really certain in those who are her own information sources.

One of my uncles once observed to me, that my mother had been through somewhat of an disturbing transition of her personality just prior to her father’s death.  It could perhaps only be a co-incidence, but that transition occurred while my father was being prepared to take a job with a higher level government security clearance, and my mother has frequently threatened me in respect of why it might have been that he nearly did not get that job, because of their association with myself.  Mum seems to suppose that she had been told the full truth by ASIO, but my own experience of their surveillance is of repeated assumptions about me which could not possibly be true.  For example, there seems to be an expectation by police that eventually I might become proven to have always been on drugs, and just adept at hiding the fact.  In reality, last year I weaned myself off chocolate milk, but am now partial to fruit tingles, that is if food addictions count.  Also I had a rare cup of black coffee on Wednesday afternoon this week, but as I am still in a coffee hang over, now on Friday morning, it is hardly likely that I will have another soon.

The fact of the matter, to the best of my knowledge, is a situation of mass mis-information among many persons, about why it is that ASIO have me under their surveillance.  That mis-information, which ASIO themselves could be partly responsible for, (but I do not know), seems to have been in a feedback process to ASIO, so that there is clear evidence that where police have participated in any misinformation campaign, it has been the police whom have caused why they suspect me.  As far as I am aware, there are, QLD state police, and also the AFP, and a number of international police forces, whom carry out observations of me.  Many of them are quite interesting chaps to talk with, as has been my habit if I get wondering about them, and it is a much better practise than feeling paranoid.  The surveillance from the QLD state police, is a purely circumstantial situation, which I have been directly informed about, and instructed in who not to associate with so as to prevent that suspicion.  However the persons whom I am told not to associate with, are nobody whom I ever sought out, and rather tend to approach me in situations in which it is inappropriate.  That is, I have been held suspect because of being sexually harassed; perhaps because my strategy of dealing with the harassment is not to be confrontational until the risks are exposed fully.  In general, the police appreciate me making myself amenable to being policed, and providing them with real information about real criminals.  However they seem excessively susceptible to real criminals given them false leads on innocent folk like me also.  It would be very easy for me to believe, as many persons being policed are in the belief of, that to lessen police suspicions, all I need is to provide them with information against other persons, and simultaneously exhibit the signs of having loads of money.

The terrible aspect of the situation for myself, and my children, is that my mother has been mis-informing everybody whom she knows, and whom I also know, about what has been happening in my life for the past few years at least, if not before also.  This is the main reason why I have not been able to sustain contact with my relations, and why I usually will not talk about these matters, because it is normally almost impossible to tell the story without it reflecting poorly on my mother.  How that situation arose is not really possible to describe here; but please accept that my long silence about some of the information in this, is because of not wanting to openly speak against my parents.

My mother told me herself once, that what she has communicated to her brothers, has made the only relatives living nearby to me, instruct their daughters to close their door in my face if I turned up on their doorstep.  Yet she also has now denied having ever said such a thing to me.  She denied it after I asserted that I know she had been lying about me at her mother’s funeral.  Also it happened recently when I saw my parents just after Christmas, ‘08, that Dad openly lied to Mum, in a really obvious way, and that is so unlike him, that I have concerns also about what sort of police scrutiny, or other pressures, they are under in light of the whole story I need here to tell.  

My concerns about the police surveillance is inclusive of the fact that their methodology is causal to the symptoms of mental illness.  (eg, their psychologists tend to look for and open and expose weaknesses in the human mind, without ever affirming positive attributes.) The more obvious position to argue is that police psychological methodology can be causal to increases of any symptoms of criminal psychology, however I am also stating that perhaps their concerns about certain individuals have instigated what at first seems to be mental illness symptoms, until fully investigated to validate evidence.  I am not saying that such is the situation in my own case, however, since there is an underlying set of factors causal to a mild post traumatic stress disorder, which is exacerbated by all undue police attention.  There is nobody who might not show any signs of suffering similar symptoms to those of mental illness, if faced with a situation in which real experience and witness is being overtly denied by persons in a position of authority.

In the matter of one of my uncles telling his daughters not to associate with me, it had been described to me as though necessitated by my having become mentally ill.  However, it might also be that my mother could have known that I am under police surveillance, and mentioning that, might not have realised herself, that my uncle cannot afford to associate with persons whom are under police surveillance since he works in the mining industry and so is himself regulated by a need for ASIO clearance.  The sort of social status which I have been subject to, which is exemplified in these comments and many others I will make, is that of having been branded as some sort of a public menace.  It is similar to any form of discrimination against any section of the population, in that what is overt in the story, is one set of facts, but that set of facts is confused for another set of facts which might or might not be true.  So the overt set of facts in which I had a hard time fully detoxifying from cannabis, during 1999, after only six months of regular use, but in an extremely stressful situation, and in that experience manifested a few low key psychotic symptoms; and then there is a covert set of information which might or might not be factual, and so I need to supply the real evidence of my experience, so that the covert set of facts cannot be interpreted, as it has been in the past, so as to assume that I could be any sort of a public menace.

Discriminating against a person who undertook to prevent themselves from being drug addicted, but might have behaved with eccentricity through that process, as though they are a public menace, is one of a set of known and studied forms of discrimination, in which the general public are lead in a similar way to being lead into false belief that the mentally retarded are all child like in acceptance of responsibility, or that blind persons cannot hear.  Most people are unconscious of propagating those sorts of patterns, but nevertheless contribute only by their own adherence to set social standards and expectations.  The issue at stake is who sets the standards, and why have I not been able to set the standards of social expectation of my through my own well minded decent behaviour.  When a person is assumed to be never likely to exhibit certain standards, and every time such standards they exhibit are ignored, then eventually only to attract attention, it becomes likely for that person to exhibit the behaviour that is expected of them.  Thereby I must say that I have chosen to yell at my mother on a few occasions, but did so as an attempt to prevent myself from yelling at other persons, and in the past few years have only ever yelled at my parents and a couple of Queensland Rail employees.  There is no behaviour I have exhibited or been coerced into which is any more menacing than those few instances. (unless needing to read my writing is experienced as menacing, in which I ought to ask why since I have no power to coerce you into reading this)

There are a couple of obvious patterns in which my personality and character are being branded as a public menace.  First is that folk who are eccentric and wealthy, can usually manage to not be also defined as a disturbance to the peace; whereas being eccentric and not being obviously very wealth, almost always causes that a person is regarded as disturbing, and thus also disturbed.  The reality is that many persons in this category, are the sort of people whom work hard and fit well into wealthier person’s contexts, but there have been other factors socially inhibiting the person from becoming wealthy.  Eccentricity can seem to manifest in any person whose character can be defined as being a “big picture thinker”, (also a few other of the work place oriented tags which tend to lend the character to leadership), but whom is not being employed in that capacity.  Usually persons on lower incomes are socially assumed to have a more limited range of possibilities of comprehension.  The second obvious set of facts about me, is the combination of affiliation with Indigenous Australians and Aboriginal culture, and affiliation with Muslims and Islamic belief.  For some reason even the police are failing to realise that such a combination of contacts and consciousness, need not be defined by the branding of being a public menace.  It is as though the police were believing that Aborigines might rise up in a terrible bloody Jihad and overthrow the government if there is any blending of Aboriginal culture with Islam; yet when that blending had already occurred some six hundred years ago, and Indigenous culture in many places can be recognised to be already a form of Islamic belief.

Clearly it is the case that any person with any underlying susceptibility to mental illness, can ill afford for there to be people in the environment denying real evidence and witness.  My own mental health pattern does not fit neatly into any known clinical diagnosis, even though I identify with the Post Traumatic Stress condition.  However since there is some discrepancy to that diagnosis (and with EVERY existing mental disease process diagnosis), it could be more like to a delayed onset and recovery of a Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD).  PTSD is a condition enabled by near death experiences, in combination with childhood trauma.  Mum and Dad are refuting that the childhood trauma happened, but it was only that I got stuck in a bucket of steaming hot water when my sister was a baby, and the event is still quite clear in my own recall memory.  (I have very real concerns about my parent’s memory in respect of me.  I know that the police strategies tend to emphasis guilt, often until the mind just cannot cope with acknowledgement, since the level of guilt is so much larger than the realistic requirement for accountability.  I know also that the policing of the Aboriginal community has lead to situations of loss of memory, because of the psychology which police rely upon when seeking to make convictions.) The actual inciting trauma for PTSD, later in life, in my case, was a mountain slide in New Zealand, with natural hot water pools nearby that were not endangered when the building we were in filled up with bits of a mountain.  My fear attached  subconsciously to the slight childhood guilt in having sat in the hot water.  I know this because after I remembered the hot water connection between the two traumatic situations, I began to more obviously recover in my capacity to assert myself normally.  When I had been first diagnosed, I was not registering the mountain slide as having had any negative impact.  It might genuinely alleviate the whole situation if anybody else might remember the hot water burn I had when three, since my mother is too determined to prove her self the victor in the question of what my problems are, to be able to let me recover.  One psychiatrist even told me about the diagnosis of Qeeg’s syndrome immediately after he met Mum and Dad. (Qeeg as in the character in Moby Dick, whose recovery was tempered by the delusion of his peers that he was still ill.)  It is not improbable that my mother’s brain injury has played a part in these matters.  She obtained brain injury from a car accident in 1983, but she is opposed to seeking to have it diagnosed.  She told me once herself that she was very conscious of the symptoms of experiencing brain damage occurring during the days and weeks after receiving a head injury in the car crash.  The possibilities include that the injury could be to the frontal lobe, in which case she ought not be drinking alcohol.  However, because the car accident was her own fault quite notably, in that she fell asleep driving, if she has been experiencing any internal mental trauma of feeling more guilt for it than is necessary, it certainly could have been damaging her memory.

I am going to present an argument for all my acquaintances whom have their own children’s needs to consider, as to whether it might be good for many more persons to begin to research the matter of what evidence there is that police surveillance could be having a larger detrimental social affect than anybody has previously been able to recognise.  My premise that there is psychologically detrimental policing occurring in Australia, need, and ought to be taken into the considerations of many persons.  Hopefully I can motivate any body who finds that their interests are aligned with my own in this, to consider aiding my own application, or making their own applications, within the Freedom of Information Act.  However, I am fully motivated my self, in making any effort in this direction, by my concerns for my own children’s well being, and to ensure my own children are never caused to be branded with a mental illness only for the sake of ease of policing.  Please bear with me needing to expose a bit of the detail of the family law case, which only starts trial proceedings this month, January ’08, in a case which commenced July ‘03.  I hope everybody reading will understand my reticence to just out and out say that there are policing agencies whom seem to suppose that certain persons, for the sake of the national security, ought not be raising their own children.  Clearly, if I were to write of a belief in such an idea, the police might only try to vindicate their assessment of chronic paranoid schizophrenia being a real diagnosis, by failing to provide evidence of the extent of their involvement.  Apart from which, I am actually not so suspicious minded myself that I cannot sustain an expectation that the situation might resolve within uncovering a web of administrative errors and general failures of communication, rather than an active police frame.

It is a little difficult to estimate what subset of the total data, is what I need to be providing within this context, and so the whole essay is rambling a bit as though without much clarity of form.  I need to express that this is partly because in each edit the whole is becoming longer as I consider making it available to a wider audience each time.  All in all, I think it is probably important to add, that I have come across a few good undercover police agents over the past few years, who did no harm, usually because they could give my own intelligence the benefit of the doubt.  That is, they could believe that I own my own intelligent analysis and evidence borne in witness. The best police agents for undercover work, seem also to be those whom attend upon their suspicious very assiduously, that is, they are less afraid of holding their suspicions up against the suspect; and thereby are more expedient in ascertaining if a suspicion is able to be validated.  In general, while this document is making a set of assertions about the potential harm which can be caused by undercover police work when it is not done well, I am not trying to make any definitive statements about whether it might have been ASIO or ASIS who misinformed my parents about me, since that could also have been caused by needless gossip.  Therefore this document addresses most of the issues surrounding my own experience through what is essentially only circumstantial evidence. 

It is my hope that those reading it will accept that the circumstantial detail is a matter each for their own conscience, and that the whole will provide for the current knowledge among that group of persons whom are aware of policing surveillance for political reasons, which is a group of persons inclusive of those whom recall the evidence, now normally kept out of the public arena, which was more obvious during the Vietnam war.  I believe that there is new generation of similar evidence, but that it has become mixed up among the evidence of drug related crimes as a part of the effect of the aftermath of the Vietnam war, and that within such a context, those whom are experiencing surveillance, are being socially isolated from one another more so than during the 1970’s, and therefore often unable to be certain of what it is that they are observing, since nobody else seems to want to know.  This is the general experience of many who have left wing politics and a Marxist analysis, but whom are not afraid of being caught by the police for drug related offences.  While those whom are afraid of being caught with drugs, tend to have discovered that they are not likely to be policed in their drug use, if only they decided that the whole issue of police surveillance is no more than a symptom of mental illness.  Within this basic situation, the circumstantial evidence available through the details of my own experience, carries a weight of needing to be evaluated by other persons whom could have been experiencing being policed by undercover operatives.  Nevertheless, we can all still hope that if I am here providing any information of relevance to the police in their own internal enquiries into potential corruption in the police force, that such matters will be dealt with internal to the police, and therefore we might not necessarily worry too much.  We can believe what we like about the police, without making ourselves any hindrance to them getting on with doing their job, and whether we like what that job is, or not. 

The security clearance my father was awarded in the public service while working as the Counsellor for Commerce at the Australian Embassy in Tokyo must have been high enough that he and my mother would have learned about the fact that I am under ASIO surveillance, though not what the nature of ASIO concerns is.  Certainly my parents both began to hold me within their own suspicions, as a possible danger in respect of what information to provide me with, as soon as Dad had the transfer into the department of foreign affairs.  But I do not know what level of security clearance it was that he had.  What they said to me, was a warning not to attempt to rely upon their own position having diplomatic immunity, within any attempts at drug dealing.  While, to myself, what is fully obvious, is that ASIO and ASIS security surveillance of me would have known without a doubt that I had no involvement then in those sort of drug related crimes, and was not a buyer of marijuana, even though I happened to have smoked it socially occasionally.  I am quite sure that their files will contain the full evidence of every time I have engaged in any way in the exchange of money for marijuana, and I have never so much as attempted to hide the facts to the matter.  To cut off at the pass all your concerns about this message being potentially also a security threat, I have to say that in the past few years I have had conversations with men, among whom have informed me of being ex-military and with a level six security clearance, and one of whom has shown me his ASIS badge and offered me his personal protection if I ever needed to provide information to the police.  The name he gave me is Peter but I will not define him any further here.  In the current level of surveillance, there are undercover police agents who openly demonstrate irritation with me, if my daily movements happen to fall outside of their knowledge of my routines.  They imply that if it happens that I need to travel into a location I have not previously attended, that I am automatically becoming a suspect for trying to avoid their surveillance.  This is just one aspect of how there arise difficulties within the context of any effort towards wage earning, since where ever I attend, is likely to also become the subject of police suspicions until the police are clear as to the reason for my attendance.

One evening an American and Australian soldier in civilian clothing began to talk with me at a MacDonald’s take away here in Brisbane: and in that conversation the American expressed a want for me to acknowledge the serious efforts that the men had been involved in at learning about what might engage me in conversation. After a substantial conversation about religious belief, he asked me to take note of the fact that both men had been living in close connection with Muslim communities, and that it was a little strange a coincidence. His comment took me fully by surprise. He was also making an implication that the American international policing of me is at odds with portions of the way that the Australian police have been policing me.  I hope that this might affirm to the Americans that I feel myself to be within their protection.  I appreciate their efforts to report accurately their observations of me, and will by trying to systematically assert, that if it seems likely that Australian indigenous communities are fulfilling the patterns of religious prophesies which were expected to be the belonging of native American communities, then the situation has arisen because of the way in which Australian police have tried to prevent that outcome.  For those who have no knowledge of the nature of the prophesies, there is one aspect in which a basic promise is made for an economic viability within environmental productivity.  (eg The prevalence of the tomato, is based in the instigation from before the British arrived in Australia, that Native Americans might be who will fulfil the prophesy.) However, within the full picture of ASIO intelligence being inclusive of persons whom own land in the outback where marijuana is being grown, perhaps the Americans will believe me about what happens when the police attempt to prevent the fulfilment of a prophesy.

I have usually been very afraid ever since I became aware of a few difficult matters in early 2003.  The information I accessed then, was in respect of how the Aboriginal community are being policed, and how that policing is driving an extreme division between indigenous persons and the Australian left wing.  We can hope for an improvement now under the Labor party.  However, those police who are at odds with other police work, are not especially empowered in the current legislation, to, for example, have been protecting my evidence in the family court as being in accord with their own; while those police who are holding me suspect are enabled within the anti-terrorist legislation, to intervene in civil court matters. My family law case has been bogged down with repeated administrative errors; and it is because I have no means of knowing whether undercover police have made any contribution to the case through their conversations with the legal professionals, that I need to obtain all of my police files.  The issue is about child safety.  I can categorically state that my own beliefs are not risking the national safety, but that assumptions that I could be a natural security threat, might well have been compromising my children’s safety, and if the police want to assert that such is not true, they will need to open the file.  Clearly they have no evidence to use for my arrest. The policing of political inclination, ought never impinge upon our child raising, and at this point, the circumstantial evidence of that is so large that the police owe it to the broader community to prove that they have not interfered in a family law situation, in which case there is ample evidence of administrative error having caused delays in court proceedings, to the extent that I and my children could even sue the Commonwealth.  Perhaps that is why the police have been so assiduously preventing me from being able to communicate my situation, since the conduct of such a court case would require community support. 

This information is known of within the Aboriginal community, and there has been an implication that if my case at law were real, then I would have been able to sue by now, but without the Aboriginal community having supported me, and even individuals among having attempted to prevent me from being able to prove my case at law.  Elements of the Aboriginal community have been gravely mistaken in expectation that only government departments make misjudgements in child protection, but that the family court’s decisions are always correct.  Within the Aboriginal community that idea has caused that certain persons are able to lever social status above others wrongfully through family court cases.  There had been a generalised social assumption that any paler skin woman was necessarily not as good a mother, and therefore ought to come last in providence of community resources, without realistic assessment of the whole situation.  That basic assumption has been furthered by police and family law professionals.  I don’t know if there are any statistics available to validate what I am telling, that the pattern of my family law case is a pattern of systemic abuse being enabled to occur, on one hand against persons who have darker skin, and on that other hand against persons who have lighter skin as though in compensation.  There has been an idea active among portions of the indigenous community, which include former prison inmates, that the way to get Aboriginal children back together with their mothers, is to blame white mothers.  I have been engaged in repeatedly working to prove that such an idea is a total fallacy.  Many Aboriginal persons comprehend what I am here telling, and those whom sustain the fallacy are most often who have been involved with drug dealing, but also, include those whom the Liberal-National politicians have given preferential treatment to.

In your own assessment of the information which I will provide through this document, can I caution that you will need to be alert to the fact that we must respect what there is existing of government processes of investigation, for example the ombudsmen.  Because if we have not engaged in ruling out administrative errors, then if the police really were engaging in placing suspicious around national security over the best interests of child welfare, they could use the evidence of administrative errors to make allegations of mental illness against those whom assert that it has been their involvement which caused any trouble.  Even though the current status of investigations in respect of my family law case is that there have not been any administrative errors, but that perhaps I might like to take the children’s representative, (who was just about to leave her position with legal aid), to the legal services commissioner; the case is that a set of administrative errors having been the problem, will more likely prove to be the preferred outcome by most parties involved.  In which the fact of there being a typographic error in a court order, might come to the fore.  However, it is clearly an isolated case, even if there happen to be many other such isolated cases, of white women having been taken to court after involvement with Aboriginal drug users.  The point is that clearly the case was not running within any community alignment with stolen generations, because of the way in which the Aboriginal community had refused to provide support.  That is not to say that the case had no connection in its founding, with my having begun an involvement with an Aboriginal man, and that fact is mentioned by Declan Grimes (my children’s father), in his case affidavits against me.  However the fact is that Declan provided the evidence of my involvement with an Aboriginal man as potentially a sign of myself becoming sexually abusive, and within a pattern of having been mentally ill.  He even claims that I had been a sexual aggressor towards himself, when in fact our ultimate breaking up was at the point at which I made it amply clear that I will not continue to perform the same sexual act for him, which his own father had against him, because it was becoming increasingly clear that he was only wanting to engage in that act as an excuse not to recover and to sustain his alcoholism.  Thereafter he left me for his other long term sexual partner, whom even has aided him in alcohol supply, and tends to have the same basic opinion of the method of dealing with incest having happened.  Declan’s current partner had previously been involved with a heroin user, who had an involvement with that portion of organised crime which supplies also to the Aboriginal community. Within these facts, clearly there is a more positive outcome available if the errors turn out to be administrative.  So perhaps when the police files are obtained, that might be all that is proven, and for the better.

There is a basic point about what happens when criminals and police work into the same strategy of setting up innocent persons in the community.  That if those innocent persons fall into the trap, then their innocence is truly tainted, and that is, in fact, the intention of those whom set up the entrapment.  The situation therefore, might be able to be construed as showing evidence of a systematic entrapment of the indigenous population into proving that they are not eligible for any claim against any precedent of compensation owing in a case of children being put at risk.  That is, if there was a real fact of prejudice against me because of having become involved with an indigenous man, which is likely, and yet the nature of the entrapment is causing the mainstream Aboriginal community to deny that such could be true.  So perhaps the statistical evidence which needs to be sought is in respect of the general experiences of white mothers who have had involvement with Aboriginal men.  Well after this case began, I met another red haired white mother, here locally, who asserted that she had been taken to court to have her children removed, after involvement with an Aboriginal man; and then again recently, I met an Aboriginal man who has a white girlfriend who is a mother, and whose ex-partner began to desire to caution her that she was not a good enough mother, after she became involved with the Aboriginal man. 

What has been frightening, is that a set of drug affected persons among the Aboriginal community were not accepting that the set up is a set up, but were trying to take advantage of the current political situation in respect of seeking attention for stolen generations, while knowing it was at the expense of white mothers.  There were insinuations that my court case was trying to steal the thunder of another, sort of phantom, long anticipated stolen generations case.  That presumption was based in an assumption on the part of black drug users at the tent embassy, that I had probably only wanted to say that I could have indigenous ancestry, so as to try to access some phantom social advantage in connection with having been oppressed through the stolen generation’s picture.  The basic politics in the Aboriginal community nationally, have begun a massive change though, ever since the intervention in the Northern Territory, and it is a change which has made the difference of opinion in community management, between traditionally oriented persons, and urbanised populations who suffered more cultural alienation, very stark.  The sort of political opinions I am describing, have been shown up to be of the detriment to more traditional communities also, as well as white mothers, which is the argument I had been making within the urban Aboriginal community all along. Those matters are also quite distinct from the issue of how police seek to socially isolate those whom they have under their surveillance, and whom are not also either alcoholic or involved in drug use related crime; and the isolation is factually more frightening, that any opinion of any black person.

To date I have not been given legal aid for anything except mediation conferencing, at which all I am offered is to accept being virtually branded as a paedophile for the rest of my life, (supervised access is the only outcome which Declan and the Children’s representative will consent to), and the legal representative I had for those conferences, most recently has expressed a real degree of consternation about how the children’s representative has been failing my children.  Therefore I have definitive reason to believe that children’s representative is probably succumbing to advice from undercover police about what is in the best interests of national security, presuming that I am myself a security threat, above the best interests of my children’s day to day well being.  Especially given that the presumption is wrong, there is a case for both the federal and state governments to answer to, and my main point in writing this whole document, is that portions of the police are taking advantage of the fact of having succeeded in socially isolating me.  Clearly the YWCA in Canberra had not been employing me to teach parenthood skills to young mothers, because they wondered if I was sexually abusive to my children, but most the legal professionals involved with the case have repeatedly refused to accept any retrospective evidence, and base their case only on the immediate situation, in which, yes, my children are now living at Declan’s house, and there is no instant need for police attendance there upon their immediate safety to the best of my knowledge.  There has been no evaluation in court of Declan’s assertions against my parenthood skills; but there has been instead two court ordered forensic psychiatric examinations.  In both of those situations, the psychiatrist examined Declan as well as myself, and chose to believe that Declan was telling the truth when he was clearly lying, but has not yet been proven by the court to have been lying, since the court would not examine the retrospective evidence.  This is the basic detail, and there is more to follow, but first I want to address the issue of whether it really might be likely for the police to have made approaches to the children’s representative.

There are other law cases now active in Australia, in which other Muslims (yes, I really did convert to Islam, but that bit comes later in this story, and yes I can give a non-religious zealot type explanation, even though I am keen on zeal), whom are under suspicion for terrorism (eg Barwon 13, and perhaps there are also others outside of Victoria, and so not receiving the same publicity among left wing activists?) (and whom are extremely unlikely to actually be real terrorists, since the internal systems to counter terrorism within the Muslim community are very strong here in Australia, because those systems are equitable with basic Australian social values) have had their legal representatives approached and instructed by police that the legislation can prevent the legal fraternity from representing such clients.  I don’t know to what degree that the police might have intervened in my family law case, but certainly my Vietnamese lawyers were not able to express that there was no such intervention.  From that point of view, if I do have a case against the Commonwealth, it cannot be made without good legal representation.  My Vietnamese lawyers can not afford their own credibility to be mixed up with mine, so it is not worth their while taking on the case, but they expressed to me clear conviction that they know an injustice has been done against me and my children, within their apology for not being able to take on the case.  It is not my own want to have to undertake the sort of legal action which might prove necessary, but it is the obvious fall back position if my children’s safety is any further compromised, and the case fails to resolve in the children’s best interests.

I do not mean to insinuate at any time, that the police could have actually been tampering with the court documents to cause administrative errors, but perhaps that the police involvement is causal to the legal clerical effort being somewhat lapse because the case is regarded to be in a unique category.  Also, there is evidence suggesting that the police have played a part in making it seem as though my assertions to the family court registry about the typographic error in a court order, were purely my own insanity.  However in September 2007, the fact was legally recognised in writing by the Family Court Registry Manager, that there was a typographic error in a court order which had been made on 30th September 2004.  There is also an argument that it might have been that the typographic error itself was cause of a different form of delay in court proceedings, in respect of denying me full hearing in an effort to adjust the interim orders to being more appropriate to the real situation, during a subsequent hearing on 4th November 2004.

For those whom are not themselves already aware of the situations of policing surveillance in the Australian community I will provide to you the information to my own knowledge of why I am under such a heavy degree of surveillance.  The basic set of data which my Vietnamese lawyers asked of me is very relevant.  They needed to ascertain that the surveillance is not being caused by any actual criminal involvement, of course. To the best of my own knowledge, (ignoring here a few odd queries made of me in respect of Mum and Dad’s friendships with Americans that began in around 1976), the ASIO file on me must have begun while I was still a teenager and living with Mum and Dad.  One day an acquaintance invited me to a peace protest outside the press club while the US secretary of state was attending.  I attended the protest and was singularly unimpressed with the form of protesting.  Although in recent years I could have begun to attribute that form of protesting to being partially caused by policing which prevents more appropriate engagement with society.  Also there is real evidence that ASIO operatives among the hippy/feral type community, engage in being those who rent the rent-a-crowd type idiots, who only turn up to protests for the cheap drugs.  Apparently it is the best strategy for keeping law abiding citizens away from making political protests.  We should all rightfully assume that ASIO do provide their information to the AFP and state police forces, for the means of policing drug crimes.

I can’t remember which acquaintance it was now who invited me to that first protest I went to, however at the time I was befriending a few of the members of a youth peace group.  Those people include Jerome Small, Mona Loofs, Tom Moore, Su Wildriver, and Dorothy Meyer, who is a sister of a high school friend, Maria.  Also I had met Mona and Jerome at high school since they did school visits as part of the peace group work, and I met Dorothy through them rather than through Maria, her sister whom I met when I was twelve.   Maria and Dorothy’s mother is a bit of a dubious character and a long term peace activist from America, (who tells me she is part native American in her ancestry, but not to tell anybody that).  She undoubtedly carries an American police record, as well as an Australian one for being repeatedly arresting during civil unrest associated with political demonstrations.  Her daughter Dorothy is a member of the Socialist Alternative, and has worked as a security guard at Parliament House in Canberra.  Their family are extraordinarily adept at fulfilling the role of being victimised to their advantage, and tend to ally themselves with one side of any argument, while accusing the other side of not looking at the situation from both sides.  Jerome is a member of the Socialist Alternative, Mona is a hippy with an ecology degree living in a co-housing community with her family in Tasmania, Tom is a glass blower, and Su an expert in sustainable urban development.  Su and Tom’s mother was a union organiser for a while.  I am mentioning these persons by name, since I know that none of them have any reason to hide from police or from their associations with myself, but also to clarify that the social causes of police surveillance are not based in criminal activity.

None of these people are drug addicts, though neither are all fully personally trustworthy.  They are really no more than a subset of my group of childhood friends though.  They are all employed, and only the Meyer family have experienced medical professionals making assertions against their mental health.  However, while Maria was able to avoid a diagnosis of schizophrenia by refuting that such could possibly be true, that exact strategy was worked to my own detriment when the condition was first in question about myself.  At the time of first becoming acquainted with these people, my mother was very clear that she did not want me to be friends with the Meyer family, and my friendship with Maria was thereby some what of a teenage rebellion.  However, later in 2003, my father accepted Maria’s mother’s advice about my mental health in good faith.  When we were teenagers and in our early twenties, Maria had a tendency to express openly that if I did not overtly substantiate myself to be a left wing activist, that she would have to regard me as aligned with Nazism.  Not that I took her seriously in my mind, but she showed clear signs of believing in herself that the politics of the left are not built on unchanging principals.  Perhaps the point is that the police might realise that it is not right to have been holding a childhood acquaintance’s perversions against me.

Before I go on into the further explanations of how I happen to be under ASIO surveillance, and why it might have increased, I will try to explain a bit more about why I am sending this, and sending it within a framework of instituting a clear set of reference points for all persons to know me, to be able to make their own investigations as to what sort of police concerns there could possibly be about me.  The main reason is because I am hoping to apply under the freedom of information act to obtain the policing records on me; and it is has been true in other cases with the level of surveillance I am under, so it is possible to presuppose the same of this case, that there will be connected to my file, files on everybody in my acquaintance.  To the best of my knowledge, the way that the files are kept is with all related files grouped together so as to make applications to look into the files very expensive, and deter the applicants.  Therefore I am hoping to find out if any of my acquaintances would also like to access the information in their own files, because there will be a cost reduction to each individual if we could make a combined application under the user pays Freedom of Information Act.  A few paragraphs later in this document there is an explanation of how I know that this is true, and the rest of this document also focuses further on why this strategy has become necessary, inclusive of further detail of the family law situation.  Also it is worth considering that in publishing this document in the internet, police reading it might seek to disprove my assertion about their paucity of compliance with the Freedom of Information Act, but only if they know that my family and friends have read this document. 

I have not really begun to consider how to organise that sort of combined application, but have recently begun to look for work to start saving to pay for it, and because I have only just recently been informed that there will be no legal aid available to me for the family law case, I also need to pay a lawyer.  I have an appointment with a legal specialist in both family law and administrative law, Ann Marie Rice, in March.  The appointment was difficult to obtain, and I got into see her because of an Aboriginal man whose first cousin is a QLD Magistrate, putting a good word in for me with his cousin’s husband, an administrative lawyer.  However, I must assert again, that I am not wanting, since neither is he, for my case to become fully associated with similar cases within the Aboriginal community. The appointment requires a $1500 retaining fee, the hourly rate is $330-, which is easily as much as for any lawyer who might not harm their own reputation by taking up the case, and who has the combination of administrative and family law expertise.  What is obstructing me is that the police have undertaken to prevent me from obtaining any money, presumably so as to prevent me from self-publishing any of my writing, or to make it easier to keep me under their surveillance by preventing me travelling, or whatever other reason they might have; but they certainly might usually be approaching anybody who considers employing me, and employers tend not to want employees who come with a need for the workplace to be fitted out for ease of surveillance, etc.  (eg, the easiest work to get is housecleaning, but it is also somewhat more expensive for the police to undertake their surveillance in that instance)  So what I am here suggesting, is perhaps two distinct things.  First is that if and when I ever happen to be in a position to be making an application within the Freedom of Information Act, I hope that my friends, family and acquaintances, might be able to consider helping to pay for it, but only if there is a valid enough reason to want to find out what the files contain out of self interest.  Second is that any of you might also want to obtain your own police files, and if it happens that your files have become connected to my own, then you can anticipate that I will like to make a financial contribution to the cost, so as to see the file in respect of myself.

Short of being able to find employment easily (other social difficulties include that every time I have approached becoming financially enabled, my life had been getting another time disrupted by a strange combination of excessive criminal interest in my person, which was intercepted by the Aboriginal community, but in a way which amounted to preventing me from getting job applications in, etc, and I would not even mention the matter except that there have been five instances of such happening, so that it seems to be a pattern: the pattern commences with strangers approaching me and asserting that I know them, and it began again very recently; however there is a fuller social explanation a bit later in this document), I have been trying to develop my skills as a writer over the past few years while being socially inhibited also through the facts around the family law case.  However, my boss as a volunteer at one of the Salvation Army shops is willing to employ me as a casual, once she clears that with her own supervisor.  The legal fees will use up most of my income, and so any help possible with the application under the Freedom of Information act will be of major assistance.  I don’t want to have to beg from you all with my reputation having already been slandered as it has been, and nobody really knowing the actual story yet. (Apparently many of my friends in Canberra had been mislead into belief that I had just abandoned my children with Declan; while in fact I have been wanting to travel to the Northern Territory, but will not make myself unavailable to my children should they try to run away from Declan and Kate Angus’ house.) So what I am asking is only for you all to consider what might be in your own interest in respect of the information in this whole document.

If it is the case that particular families are under police surveillance automatically in subsequent generations, then the issue of child raising within the frame work of that knowledge needs to be considered by many of my acquaintances, and this document partially addresses my concerns about that. Also there is a level of evidence, which I will go further into later in the document, that policing surveillance can induce certain behavioural alignments, including prostitution, drug use, overexposing weaknesses, and eccentricity generally.  I will provide evidence within a framework of social analysis which is full separate from your considerations of my own legal situation. That is fully necessary because I have a set of information provided to me from me whom have been in prison, and many of whom cannot speak about the matter due to their parole conditions.  I hope that you will all be able to assess the evidence in the whole document, within the two distinct frameworks, one of my own court case, and two of the larger social implications of what has been happening to me since the court case commenced and I moved into Queensland.  Needless to say that I have been made acutely aware of many of the immediate issues which the indigenous community are facing, and of how those issues often can be masked as personal, when in fact they are indicative of systemic oppression.  The point is that some of the social forces influencing the negative outcome in this particular family court case, were also influencing very many other people, both indigenous and non-indigenous; and in fact perhaps any Australian whom happens to have any person whom has ever been in police custody, (whether rightfully or wrongfully), within their larger social network.  Perhaps the strongest indicator of what I intend to express, is that in England, any left wing political activist can anticipate being asked whether they are willing to endure arrest and legal proceedings so as to make a political point; while today in Australia, nobody would condemn any person, (bar those ASIO approved among all the ‘Karen Silkwood’s at Pine Gap), to such an experience.  Australian police just are physically rougher with demonstrators than the English police would ever be let to get away with.  English political activists employ strategies of applying the law to the police of course.

In respect of why I know that the ASIO files might be connected to the files of every person I know, you will need the following information:  I have an acquaintance named Kerry Browning, who was a member of Women Against Racism, a group I joined in 1988.  Women Against Racism started from a women’s night on the roster of the picket of the South African Embassy in Canberra, when under the apartheid regime, and it there was much involvement in the insemination of Women Against Racism, from women working in women’s services.  By 1988 Women Against Racism had changed its focus a little away from being an anti-apartheid specific organisation, and was trying to work more broadly and inclusive of working more directly against racism here in Australia.  Women Against Racism has a reputation for not buying into any argument of need for racial segregation, such as has become prevalent in the Aboriginal community, and that position was always upheld within support from Traditionally Oriented Aborigines living in remote Australia.  In 1989, after the more obvious work of Women Against Racism to publicise anti-apartheid politics, Kerry was arrested and charged with fire bombing South African diplomat’s motor vehicles, and after a very expensive trial, was acquitted.  

Kerry was married at the time to a man named Maxwell Nemadzivanani, who was a representative here in Australia, and later to the U.N., of a break away youth/left wing faction from the ANC, called the Pan Africanist Congress (PAC).  I met Max briefly also in London when he was giving a talk to the City of London Anti-Apartheid group, and Declan and I first met while volunteering with that Anti-Apartheid group, to be on the roster to picket the South African Embassy in London.  The City of London Anti-Apartheid group were a break away minority from the larger British Anti-Apartheid movement organisation, and the break had occurred around keeping up a 24 hours 7days a week picket of the South African Embassy, calling for Nelson Mandela’s release. Declan was once included in the City of London Anti-Apartheid group security for the visit to London of the leader of the PAC, in 1989.  So he and I are certainly both within the frame of being the sort of person whom the police might have suspected of unlawful activity sponsoring civil unrest against the apartheid regime.  During Kerry Browning’s trial, the ASIO and ASIS files, (maybe also AFP), about her were obtained.  There were log entries of her (and presumably also Maxwell’s) whereabouts and activity, being made at ten minute intervals for a period of some years.  I assume that they did not arrest Maxwell only because that would have given the case international publicity, or because he sustained real diplomatic immunity.

There was also, among Kerry’s files, a whole file on every person whom she or Maxwell had spoken to during the same time frame.  Therefore I have every reason to believe in all sanity, that the policing surveillance of me is real.  I do not know any more detail here than this, such as about what was inside the file, but could potentially find out.  For example, I do not know which police department(s) Kerry obtained the files from, which provided evidence to acquit her.  I do not know if the file about me, among all Kerry’s files, was any smaller or larger than the files about most of her acquaintances.

Before her arrest, Kerry, and other persons in the group Women Against Racism, that I became a member of in 1988, were all clearly able to observe the level of police surveillance, and it had been pointed out to me and I paid no particular attention.  I was then not nearly so astute in my observations since I had a long term perineal prolapsed.  However we all discussed, and live by, a very clear position about the fact: that if there is politically motivated policing work happening, the best we can do is to stay law abiding, and not let it bother us or prevent us in our own work.  That approach is the best way of sustaining stability while witnessing evidence of unnecessary police work, which might be denied if we spoke about it openly.  Tanya McConvil has collected some evidence of people whom have spoken up against the police in Canberra, and whom have then been brought further into suspicion with the police surveillance teams on that basis.  The policing strategy she has collected evidence of, is that in which the suspects have witnessed real evidence of policing failures, and are then being portrayed as insane, as a means to prevent that person giving evidence.

My own opinion of what Tanya has told me, is that the police might be attempting to thwart any efforts being made by members of the public, which could become alike to sedition or treason.  For example, if I did not here warn you that this is only my own opinion, and not to be believed in without evidence, then perhaps police might regard this writing here as seditious, and thus an arrest-able offence, if I am doing it within an intention to thwart the cause of law and order. But if it might only be an accident that my writing could stimulate any public upheaval against the government outside of the election process; then the police would not have success in court, and so are reticent to make an arrest to prevent such writing, and therefore they work to dismiss its credibility.  That is, of course, assuming that the information I am providing is of the sort which they might be policing with an eye to the crime of sedition as it is defined within the anti-terrorist legislation, in which the police are defined as having unusual powers.  Remember that this is, after all, only my own opinion, in which I actively tend to give the police the benefit of the doubt.  The practise of giving anybody the benefit of the doubt, as our legislative system is based upon, and as is the basis also of Islamic law, is a practise in which, if no doubt remains, that fact is very clear.  However, if the practise is not upheld, then the whole system is subject to failure, since the wrong persons could then become charged as guilty parties.  However, Tanya has a very long set of her own evidence about these matters, which I have not seen.

My point is obviously that the systematic dismissing of my political credibility need never have impinged upon a family law case, and I will endeavour to provide a bit more of the contemporary details around that case here now.  To date the family law case has not undertaken the appropriate level of social work reporting which is demanded in family law, by the legislature, if ever any allegation, from either parent, against the other one, is made of sexual abuse.  Declan has made such allegations. 

Most recently the children’s representative called my own legal representative an idiot at a directional hearing, because she tried asking one last time for that level of reporting to be ordered through legal aid for the trial. 

My sons have asked me if they can make their own contribution to the court case, but are too afraid to mention the matter in their father’s house. 

It might be that there is evidence in police files which points to why the children’s representative had been negating the need to obtain complete evidence, but I do not know.  When the state ombudsman asked me if I was intending to take the first children’s representative in the case to the Legal Services Commissioner, I already know that she was soon to be leaving legal aid, was not certain of the likelihood of success, since there were still many other mitigating factors, and I did not have any of the social and personal support necessary to sustain that sort of an enquiry being made through my own individual complaint.  It also happens that I knew that the reputation of that particular children’s representative was good, and that I believe that she had been lead astray in her initial assessment of the case, by the fact of a known administrative, or postal, error at the outset, in which it seemed as though I did not care to fight the case.  So she had asserted herself in the situation within an implication that my case as only wasting court time and money.  The original error is connected with a lawyer whom I did eventually complain to the Legal Services Commissioner about, (after first complaining to the Law Society), and whom had already been removed from the register of legal practitioners here in the State of Queensland by then.  The Law Society lead me astray as to their intentions toward that solicitor, and there is actual evidence on paper of their having lead me astray.  The children’s representative was neither funded for enough time through legal aid to fully examine the case, and I am instructed by Legal Aid Queensland, and by the Ombudsman, to believe that she had no say in the level of funding being applied to the case.  Further to that, there are the forensic psychiatric reports against me, and her failing was really only in not fully considering my own legal argument against that expert evidence as inadmissible.  That legal argument is the one I was prevented from making because of the typographic error in a court order.

The horribleness of the situation is that a part of the reasoning of the police in holding me under their suspicions, is simply my capacity herein to made valid arguments against the basis of the current regime of legislative justice.  After all, if legislative justice is not able to protect children, then what good is there left in it?  Yet in saying that, I need to caution everybody reading, that I am not intending to ask you all to enter into a bloody violent uprising against the nation state. Of course my writing is not seditious, since I am intelligent enough to realise that it is not in my children’s best interests for me to be arrested for sedition; but neither am I in the belief that making active enemies of those who support the legislative framework of nation states, is in the real interest of basic human rights, or the rights of the child.

I have received legal advice not to assume that there is any allegation of real child sexual abuse against me, since Declan makes his allegations within the framework of accusing me of being insane.  He alleges to the psychiatrist, and in person to his lawyer perhaps also, but in affidavit he says only that I am already too far gone insane to be able to be trusted not to so commit in future.  If it is the case that nobody was really suspecting me of any such crime against my children, then why was Declan let to slander me, why did the first forensic psychiatrist portray Declan’s statement that the police will press charges for child sexual assault against me as soon as he asks them to, as though a fully sane assertion on his part, and then the second forensic psychiatrist (both employed by the court), describe me as showing evidence of paranoia because of my fears about how Declan had been reporting an incident of something that really happened in 2007 with my oldest son Zimma, and also after Declan had attempted to portray that exact event as evidence that he had always been correct about me, but not directly to the second forensic psychiatrist.  The situation is almost amusing except that finding it to be clear evidence against the current court process, is not what might enable my children immediate safety. 

Declan’s assertion was that the police would charge me with child sexual abuse as soon as he gave them the go ahead, and that was reported as a fully sane point of view by the first forensic psychiatrist.  The second forensic psychiatrist described my belief that a particular incident with Zimma, (while Zimma was in Declan’s care but Declan had described it as though Zimma could have been associating with the conditions in my care), had even happened, as though fully only a delusion; but when in reality, when it first happened, nobody told me about it because I was under suspicion of having lead Zimma astray into poor behaviour. When my mother eventually told me, it was in that way she has of blaming for a thing long gone; but in her overtly blaming me, is how I even found out about the incident.  

What happened was only that Zimma had been seen by the library staff to be manipulating his penis while using a public computer.  He asked me not to tell anybody, and is supported in that request by Declan, however, my belief is that it is in his best interests to face up to his own shame about what he was doing.  Clearly with the matter having been reported to authorities at such a young age, (the librarian told me that had he been only a year older, she would have phoned the police and would have a police record), he needs to be able to face up to himself now, so that the behaviour pattern of looking at pornography, which began after he went to Declan’s house, needs to be nipped in the bud.  In his defence I will add here that there are rampant stories afoot about him looking at pornography and exposing his younger brothers to it, but that his younger brothers are adamant to my witness that they have never seen any, nor seen Zimma looking at any.  However Declan has a long history of use of pornography, and so I would not be surprised if Zimma had seen some, or had even used the computer at Declan and Kate’s house to look at it.  Perhaps it was Zimma who caught Declan looking.  Also the librarians told me that they did not catch a sight of what Zimma had been looking at on the computer, and I happen to know that he had a crush on a girl who is now employed in the video game industry, and produces Manga like cartoons, which he could potentially access in the internet.  Much more recently, his friend’s mother has found evidence of him using the internet at her house to look at pornography, with software that records the whole internet history.  He denied that he had looked at it when I mentioned it, until I informed him that I was in accurate information from his friend’s mother, at which he became extraordinarily embarrassed.  He needs to sustain himself within that attitude of internal embarrassment at his own weakness. 

 When I found out about the incident, I approached the public library staff asking if the incident was real, and they affirmed it with clear evidence.  It was reported to me that their concern was more so about why Declan had laughed when they informed him, and I was told that in a high school a mandatory report to the department of child safety would have been made against Declan.  Zimma was very sad at the time, and did not seem to recover his spirits at all until I brought the matter up with him, but since the court order prevents me discussing it with him, little was said.  He seems sad that he was not being disciplined. He felt betrayed by my mother, in that he expected she would have told me about the incident sooner.  In fact, if I had been told immediately, it could have given me the upper hand in the court proceedings, and Zimma is clever enough to have done it to himself for that very reason.  The situation was much resolved in his own mind after we discussed it, in the limited way appropriate.  I asked if he had been given the information he needed by Declan, so as to know why not to behave in a way so as that members of the public are worried about where his hand is; he asserted that the only thing Declan ever said was that all he need know about his genitals is that it grows when you touch it; and then I informed him that since he is so very tall already, perhaps his growth has reached its maximum.  The fact of the matter is that after that conversation he has been showing many signs of being better adjusted and feeling more secure.

The way the court case is being managed, even without reference to the police’s contribution, is with an assumption of Declan’s victory being highly dependant upon assuming that I might never receive any social support.  Even within an assumption that I might not even want my children returned to me, there would have been no possibility of the case sustaining its current trajectory if we had been living in Canberra, or Armidale, or any place where I am known by other parents. There is neither any possibility that I could myself have ever preferred for Declan Grimes and Kate Angus to be raising my sons, than to be doing that work myself; and if I had wanted them to be on permanent childcare duty, I certainly would not have been moping around in Brisbane, but might have moved to a place where I was more likely to be heard in my assertions about the right wing set up going down in Australian racial politics.  Meanwhile the police are very overt in preventing that I could receive any real social support. The police seem to encourage the worst (or is it more so the worst abused?) among their informants, who are also their suspects, to befriend or follow me.  However, it could be rather that there are other criminals are who have engaged in that sort of systematic abuse of my reputation, and tried to set me up in respect of the police.  So it would be good to see what is in the police files so as to know.  Perhaps the files might even vindicate the police and vindicate my sanity at the same time.

I will provide more information to that situation later in this document.  At this time, I have still not been able to extract the evidence from the legal system, even in having been to the Ombudsman, as to whether the case is just failing to be given enough attention, which is a remediable fault, and is about jurisprudence, or if the case really had been influenced negatively by the police.  Potentially, there is still an option of the whole thing resolving if only the legal system can evaluate the case as deserving of retrospective funding.

(but it should not be necessary to go into weird conspiracy theory number 256, known of through the drug using community, including in conversation with a methadone addicted former Australian soldier whom had fought in the middle east, become addicted to heroin there whilst on duty, opposed the command of an American commanding officer to shoot to kill through the child if the child is in front of its father –apparently the Americans portrayed Muslims as wanting to use their children as a human shield- , then was arrested and held in Guantanamo Bay, where a supply of narcotics was kept up to him: that particular conspiracy theory being that the “Djinn” who are mentioned in Qur’an as supernatural beings, like the Australian Wandjina, might have some method of escaping from the planet earth if Human beings were to just keep on damaging the environment too badly, and that therefore (don’t laugh because you might insult the CIA’s intelligence), that method of escape, ought to be able to be stolen by human beings since the Djinn are also able to account for all Human error, eventually, that is, in the fullness of the apocalyptic prophesies etc; and the solution of escape seems to be more viable to those whom want to continue capitalist over expenditure of Earth’s resources– now while such weird conspiracy theories are just that, nothing more than a form of elaborate floral abundance upon fear of what is driving the police, it is odd that many drug users are familiar with such, odd that the CIA has a reputation for investigating Alien sightings and even harnessing Alien powers, and most of all odd that Australian foreign policy seems to bow down to such bizarre power mongering, in respect of management of policing internationally that is; all this with an accompanying apology that I am quite unable to validate any such conspiracy theory as having any substance in reality.)

In respect of where police surveillance of me is much more obviously defined, I have experienced being prevented from socialising with persons with socialist politics here in Brisbane, whom would have otherwise formed the mainstay of my social support network, as has most often been the case since I was a teenager.  The police particularly have attempted to thwart my attendance at land rights demonstrations. The only other longer term social network I have had, outside of connections to the Aboriginal community, in which my own mother portrays me as insane without really knowing the nature of those affiliations, is that of other mothers.  However, while my children are not with me, and with that fact needing a long winded painful explanation, it is really not particularly appropriate for me to be mixing with other mothers, since their own children’s immediate needs are not served by their mother being stressed about my children’s immediate needs.  The Muslim community have been very open to me, but are reticent to inflame the situation of how they are already being policed within anti-terrorist legislation.  Christian Church communities have not been so open to me, except for the extremist evangelical sorts, whom are also the most suspicious about the family court case.  That is with the exception of an Aboriginal Jehovah’s Witness church which is local to me where I am living at the moment, but as I am not a Baptised Jehovah’s Witness, and not likely to become one as a Muslim, the whole situation of my daily life, and need to communicate, is become fully absurd to even try to describe.  Yet these facts also have caused that there are assertions against me of having wanted to rely on my sons just for their company.


The next paragraph, is long, and goes into a bit more of the family law case history, by which you could validate the fact that the police files need to be obtained to ensure my children’s wellbeing is attended to within the family law act.  No need to read it if you can believe me without.  There is a part that repeats matters already mentioned.

Declan’s assessment in the first place, that I might be a paedophile, was made after I left a telephone message reminding the children about the practise of genital ablutions as Muslims and other people, like the Ananda Marga’s use, (just like using a French bede).  Declan had previously agreed with me asking him if he would provide the children reminders to develop the habit, which prevents any smegma, and teaching the habit usually started in the Muslim community at the same age as a circumcision is done in the Jewish community.  

There is some evidence which was presented to court which I have not been able to view, and so which might have been construed to contain evidence against me, since I have not been able to provide a response to it. It was from a counsellor’s report made about Zimma when he had been attending the Yeronga Clinic for youth psychiatric health.  He was sent there after losing his temper and throwing a chair in his first year of high school, at a boy who is now his best friend.  Zimma, who has just turned sixteen in December ‘07, is experiencing fear around having been tricked into saying things which make it seem like it is all his own fault that the court won’t believe me.  He had been told, by either Declan or Kate (Kate is Declan’s partner, Kate Angus, who he has been seeing since part way through my pregnancy with Sal, as many of you will recall, but that information is told startlingly differently within Declan and Kate’s own affidavits) or somebody they spoke with, that his mother “might be a paedophile, and so Zimma had construed in his own mind, that the crime involved with “paedophilia” must be that of the behaviour which Declan and Kate did not want me to exhibit, of going near to their house.  So when he was twelve, he was for a time in the belief that a paedophile is a stalker, and a stalker is a person who wants to visit but is not welcome by the house owners.  Clearly a full social work report should have been made long before now, especially in light of the fact of what happened in the public library.  

Meanwhile the lawyer who represented me at the mediation also took up doing the directional hearings for trial while influenced negatively by Declan’s descriptions of the event in the public library, and so no application is made to subpoena the evidence.  However then, as said, when the second forensic psychiatric report was made, the psychiatrist used my description of my concern about the fact of what happened, as though evidence that I am too fully delusional to know that it did not happen.  Then the psychiatrists report was first presented at a directional hearing, but not filed.  Then, after that, my lawyer went on holiday and his boss became more amenable to my case, Declan’s lawyer handed their case over to another lawyer in their firm, and the children’s representative changed also, just co-incidentally.  So in the final directional hearing that psychiatric report was accepted for the trial without questioning its viability as evidence, whereas before it had not been filed; but the matter of the evidence about what really happened was not known by the new lawyer representing me, and so that evidence, (from the librarian who said an report against Declan ought to be made), is not agreed upon to become a part of the trial. The first trial hearing this month, January 2008, on the 25th.  I have had no actual legal representation in any portion of the case except through the directional hearings at which the lawyers were refusing to address my instructions about what evidence needs to be provided.  

The case has been stream lined in the family court case management procedures as a non-complex case, which is awarded a lesser amount of funding. That is because of the first person who stood for me in court, having been in error, and he is who is already removed from the register of practising solicitors in Queensland over another matter. He was appointed by my Kyogle lawyer who assured me that the case would be streamlined as a complex case, but could not attend court on the day, and although she clearly posted it, my original affidavit, neither was taken into court.

I have written to the court registry to complain about the need to make the case streamed as complex, on two occasions, and at first had to go to the ombudsman to cause that my letters were answered, then the second time I engaged in a considerable amount of correspondence with the Court Registry Manager, James Cotta, who eventually clarified that I had been at all times correct in my assertion about a typographic error in one of the court orders; and only after that would he advise me of the name of the person in the family law court whom I needed to write to for enabling that the case became re-assessed as a complex case.  I was also advised to rely on my then solicitor in that process.  However my solicitor failed to take the matter up immediately, and then went on holiday, and I was not informed of his having gone away until immediately prior to the following directional hearing, and another case conference the next day.  I had assumed that my legal representative was acting for me in respect of the matter, however the legal aid grant did not stretch that far, because the case was not streamed as a complex case.

The issue as to whether the case needs funding for assessing retrospective evidence, is being dealt with by Legal Aid as through the Federally funded court house’s responsibility, and by the court as though the decision belongs with the state funded legal aid children’s representative, with some input from other representatives, in which both my representative and the children’s representative are already underfunded.  Some strange administrative evidence has arisen in this respect.

I had been offered legal aid only for a case mediation conference, even though Declan was refusing to attend conference.  Then, in early 2007, after I went to both Commonwealth and State Ombudsman in late 2006, and another Barrister wrote a letter on my behalf as part of his pro bono work contribution, Declan agreed first to removing the supervision requirement only for Zimma, (who was already himself negating the need to turn up to a child care centre to see me, simply because Declan rarely know where Zimma was when it was time for an access visit), and then agreed to a conference.  At the conference no agreement could be reached, and the lawyers all seemed furnished with a new set of allegations against me from Declan that I was not being informed of the content of; however the conference mediator, was asserting a clear belief that the case ought to be receiving further funding, and advised that she would advise the Legal Aid CEO to provide funding for my case for a trial.  However the Children’s Representative then tempered that by insisting that the level of funding should be determined within another examination of my mental health state, which I was happy to comply with.

During 2007, four directional hearings occurred, and a new forensic psychiatric report was prepared.  The psychiatrist notified my legal representative, that he would not conduct the report unless he received more funding than legal aid would provide.  $310 extra were charged to my then legal representatives.  The children’s representative spoke at length to the psychiatrist, instructing him in what among the court documentation to consider.  The psychiatrist advised me that he would not consider any of my own assertions as to what material had any relevance.

Then after the forensic psychiatric report was prepared, but before it was filed, there was another request made for another case conference.  At first I was told that it had been Declan’s solicitor who made the application.  My lawyers asked me to fill out a form for a new legal aid grant of aid to cover their representation at the conference.  I was sent a letter stating that legal aid had been provided, and that letter was accompanied by an assessment sheet, of the sort normally given to applicants receiving funding for a retrospective case.  Because of that I assumed that my lawyer had spoken on my behalf during the third directional hearing, or shortly thereafter, and caused the case to receive funding appropriate for a complex case.  However, then later I received a second letter advising me that I had been given a legal aid grant of aid, and it was the sort of letter provided when only minimal funding is being applied.

Thereafter I learned that it was the children’s representative whom had asked for a conference.  The lawyer who went on holiday asserted that Declan’s lawyer had asked for the conference, and the other lawyer in the firm representing me, had asserted that the children’s representative had asked for the conference.  The conference was scheduled for the day after the last directional hearing.  At the conference there was a social worker in attendance, clearly evidencing that an increased level of funding was being applied to the case; but the children’s representative had insisted that the conference be by telephone, and the mediator had already spoken with her, and she had insisted that she would not listen to my case, and was totally unable to be persuaded out of the position of demanding that the final orders at trial will be made exactly the same as the current interim orders.  She completely negated the fact that the current interim orders are already altered in respect of Zimma, and that the immediate situation is that since September 2007, the supervision centre will no longer accept our family due only to their own price rises.  It turned out that the particular supervision centre which the court had advised us to use, was one which only had other clients through the department of child safety, (QLD DOCS).  The first children’s representative had previously relied on her own descriptions to a Judge of very minimal note taking from the staff at the supervision centre, who are trained to make notes only of any possibility of any negative affect of the access.  However both Declan and myself have a signed agreement with the supervised access centre, that their staff’s notes will not be relied upon in court, and that if evidence is sought from the centre, it would be provided by a funded report from a senior member of staff with paralegal qualification.  The negative influence of the notes which the children’s representative nevertheless has on subpoena, is shown up in the notes of the first visit, in which my tucking my finger tips into the top of my jeans, is described as with-hands-inside-pants or other words to the effect of is seeming as though I had been masturbating in front of everybody.  That sort of circumstance within the case is what had lead me to believe that the legal system is systematic in underfunding potential perpetrators, in cases in which there is good reason to actually suspect child abuse; which is why I was reticent to take the individual person of one children’s representative whose reputation is not too bad at all, through the Legal Services Commission.  Yet now I find I am being defined as paranoid for ever suspecting that there could be suspicions against me as though I might have been a child abuser.

My own reading of the legislation, as it was at the time the case opened in July 2003, is that every accusation of child sexual assault requires retrospective analysis.  But in the general picture of the whole proceedings, it has been me who was being lumbered with the reputation of wasting court time and money by filing documents.  My documents have been repeatedly dismissed in court as only insanity.  Apart from the two forensic psychiatric reports, (which were informed also by Declan in a fashion as though, when he was being examined, his whole task was to give evidence against me, and which little consider the bulk of evidence of my real recovery) the only assertion against me, other than being a potentially able to sexually abuse a child, (due to mental ill health that is), is that I home-schooled my children during 2002.  My mother’s assessment of that situation is proven invalid by the department of education files, and in fact the children’s attentiveness to their school work, and general standards increased tremendously during that time.  I also have in the court files the educational psychological reports I had made on the children, for some professional advice as to whether my decision to home-school was in the children’s best interests.  There was even one day during our homeschooling when I had my sons working at their books in a psychiatrists waiting room, (and a few times in the psychologist’s waiting room), while I had my mental state checked up; and in which the verdict was that there was no reason for concern.  However all that evidence is being fully negated by the family court process so far.

It strongly seems that the Queensland police could have been seeking evidence against me in alignment with Declan’s assertions against me, which he has not fully made through the legal process, but only to his lawyer and to the first forensic psychiatrist.  However, more recently, it must be that the Queensland investigation team finally cross referenced their data with that of ASIO surveillance teams, and I am not longer being watched so determinedly by the Queensland police who work in cases of sexual offences.  One of their officers has informed me that, since I am no longer now, as I had been, occasionally eating a free meal among the homeless people in the city, they realise that they had no cause to be concerned about me; and could I please manage to budget for food properly now.  No problem, I answered, and, of course you will remember my repeated assertions that I would not have been availing myself of the meals if my children had been in my company, or words to that affect.  I am very well fed now that I do not need to pay the $120 per fortnight for two hours of access supervision.  However, there is no supervision happening at this time, since the other centres are full over the Christmas period; but also because I noticed that the children were less stressed over the phone when the access visits were not happening.  Therefore, I am in the belief that it is as I had feared, that the supervision requirement was placing undue psychological pressure on my children: in that they were pressured to believe that experiencing my company as safe and loving, was in fact a form of being abused.  This is my serious reason for ever sustaining any argument that there could be any level of compensation owing.

Declan seems to have consistently relied upon his own previous knowledge of how the police already have a framework for dismissing my sanity; using that in court, but also against our sons.  Declan has actively lied to both the forensic psychiatrists. He reported to them that he himself had experienced being violated by me and that he worried that I could have become insane enough to rape one of my sons in the future if they were to be given back to me; sort of as though it could have happened by accident and without me even really conscious of it, that I could have become so ignorant.  Yet within that context, the legal advice I have been given by my legal aid funded lawyers, (different from the initial advice from the Kyogle Lawyers who were planning to ensure the case become filed as a complex case), was to play the case very passively.  The asserted also, that if I was not to take their advice in that, they would be forced to inform legal aid Queensland that I was not taking their advice, and that therefore was likely to be truly insane, and that therefore the legal aid grant for trial, after directional hearings, then in place, would be removed.  It was not until preparing for the final of four directional hearings, that the second lawyer in their firm to look into the case, undertook to follow my own instructions, but by which time it was already too late.  Meanwhile I had paid to see another lawyer in the City who takes legal aid cases and does family law, and asked them a number of questions around the case and the legal aid process. They gave me a referral to four legal firms who could take the case on within a legal aid grant, but subsequently I have had the preferable referral given to me through the Aboriginal community.   I ought also say, that within the Aboriginal community, there are certain families who can access more authoritative legal attention than others; and it is not, as I have heard of outside of the Aboriginal community, that all Aborigines get better access to legal professionals by government preference. Additionally, that extra legal attention is not actually providing any real social advantage, beyond letting certain persons experience mainstream society as though it is without any sanctions at all, which at least prevents a significant proportion of the indigenous youth population from having been sexually violated in the prisons. 

The situation I am being faced with, is to believe either that a set of slanderous allegations have been made against me, from which I might receive no social support to defend myself from, or I will be regarded as fully paranormally paranoid whether I am or not.  That pattern is common place among persons who are involved with organised crime, but with a third choice there available to persons whom seek protection from criminals rather than the police.  The third choice is that of prostitution and drug abuse.  Often, in fact, when I can prove to police that I am both intelligent and not abusive, they tend to suppose that therefore I can only be a prostitute and/or drug dealer.  Perhaps I am, and I will have to let you all decide that for yourselves, although at the outset I had preferred to be branded as having had an episode of mental illness, to being branded as a prostitute and drug addict, because it is a better belief for my children to hold about me.

The sort of assertion that Declan has made about me, as though just too vacuous to remember the child abuse is bad, and that there was ever any supposition that it could be perhaps true, has lead me to wonder about whether there is a regard for me among police, that the sort of abuse I was subject to at the tent embassy in Canberra, might have caused some level of mental retardation, as happens in extreme cases of that form of abuse.  So here I need describe the peripheral information to that part of the story also. There is a way of abusing a person so as to impose a drug addiction, and to cause that they are socially branded as insane if they refuse the drugs, (or in worst case scenario branded as an actual paedophile without having committed such, but that part of the choices being provided during the abuse is normally not mentioned), and it is common place in many parts of Australia within criminal contexts.  It is known of by the women who work in rape crisis centres as the sort of ritual abuse which can cause multiple personality disorder, and in some persons efforts to prevent the disease, have lead to brain damage being caused by high level of supply of cortisol in the brain chemistry.  Such practises are monitored by organised crime, and those men who perpetrate the associate rapes, are taught to whilst in prison.  There are many ex-prison inmates who have used the technique to portray innocent victims as though guilty of their own crimes, and the police seem to work aligned with that pattern, perhaps because the whole organised system includes a set of persons whom are set up into the function of providing false evidence to the police.

However, that might be only how it seems to me, in being one of the persons whom has been abused, since that is the nature of the abuse, to cause that the mind orients itself into observing corruption rather than observing law abidance.  Within the statements of this paragraph, clearly I have a self interest in my sanity at stake, in wanting to acquire the police files as a law abiding person.  Yet also what I believe to be true is that there is a bigger social issue at stake, about how the police are failing to work in conjunction with one another successfully.  (eg AFP  policing of drug crimes is being kept separate from the policing of child pornography and prostitution, but when the drug dealers also have a trade in selling information about who is not likely to be able to prevent themselves being branded as a mother who has let her children be at risk.  The  information I am providing here, is very hard to come by, and saying it openly has already put me at risk from among organised crime, mainly through the Aboriginal community, but also others in Canberra who are mutual acquaintances with Declan and Kate.)  Now I happen to have noticed of myself, that if I am reticent to believe that there is an actual organised crime conspiracy in place against me, then the symptoms of mental illness manifest. Yet when I accept that what was done to me in Canberra, and then also later again in Brisbane, was an effort to force me into a multiple personality disorder, then there are no symptoms of mental illness.  However the recovery from the sort of abuse which causes the condition, is not as simple as just belief.

Fortunately I already had a good set of information about the specific form of abuse, and so when it was being conducted, I realised what was being attempted.  Then I realised also, that my only chance was to sustain total recall of every effort being made against me.  The pattern is of one set of persons observing the victim’s body language, for signs of postures which show positions which belong within a known story line and traditional dance, then when certain known postures are entered into, another person might say something odd, so that there becomes a verbal correspondence in experiential learning, with specific postures that already had other known correspondences.  Then later those verbal cues are used to trigger the particular pattern of behaviour which aligns to each known posture.  In extreme cases the whole arrangement is accompanied by violence and violent rape.  However, I overheard a perpetrator at the tent embassy, who was already clearly not noticing how good my recall of the situation has always been, asserting that they would just have to use the abuse of screaming at me to entrap me through stimulating my fear.  What I notice is that various verbal formulations, now connect with intellectual reactions in me, which have no reason or rational logical process; and so when I hear those particular words, I must negate the impressions that I receive.  That is why it is very important in recovery, to be able to fully recall the experience of the abuse in every way, since we cannot sustain ourselves by negating verbal expression we might hear.  Usually the abuse is also further engaged by use of sodomy to prevent the memory, however in both instances of the tent embassy, and later in Brisbane during 2005, I escaped being sodomised. 

I happen also to have met two former prison inmates, whom both provided evidence to the ABC 4 Corners programme, presented by Andrew Ollie, called “Out of Sight, Out of Mind”.  Both of those persons completed psychology qualifications after speaking openly for the television crew, and both sustain a high rank among all former prison inmates, despite having given information against those prisoners whom had first abused themselves.  Both were overconfident about showing off their skills as criminal experts in the field of causing multiple personality disorder.  Neither are whom I have, or could afford to have, report to the police as a rapist.  Their technique involves mainly abuse of the spine, and associating various postures with various counter-posed ideals, and is inclusive of causing that feeling loved and respected becomes associated with never informing anybody of the situation.  In prison the abuse which causes men like those two, and others I have met, to want to reinforce the causes of their own suffering, is a very complex array of social conditioning, in which sodomy and bashings are only a part, but fear of murder is the greater part.  Other aspects are drug supply in the food, allocation of material resources, such as televisions and jobs, according to biological responses to being raped and/or bashed; and worst of all, being caused to fear having to sodomise a paedophile (for example, maybe a prisoner who is convicted for a different offence and are hiding knowledge of their other crimes from the rest of the prisoner population, who try to ascertain their guilt by raping them to access information about their conscience through responses to being raped; those with something to hide  cause themselves to become extremely constipated, and the most extremely constipated men, tend to access improved social conditions; and this sort of example is true to the extent that nobody is really certain if the persons branded as “rock spiders” really are the only offenders of paedophilia, while everybody realises that certain persons who are branded as “rock spiders” are not the real paedophiles, but only those whom could not sustain their real social identity among other prisoners) only so as not to be murdered, (prisoners actively suspect one another to an excessive degree, and use sodomy and violence to assess guilt; and impose engaging in that technique upon all other prisoners also), or being branded as a paedophile when not one, only for the safety of receiving the protection of the prison guards.

Meanwhile Declan and his present partner, Kate Angus, are both still playing into the role of having been victimised by adults who raped them when they were themselves still children, and Kate once said openly that it might be good for Zimma that once a friend of their’s attempted to rape him.  They have both themselves been subject to the same sort of ritualised type abuse, with Declan having been brutally raped late one night in Canberra in 1994, (a fact which the perpetrator at the tent embassy who raped me, informed me that he knew of), and then locked up by the police, immediately after which he first met Kate.  Kate had just then recently left a boyfriend who was a heroin addict and so had, no doubt, also been exposed to the same set of social conditioning.  The pattern in which criminals condition one another, and youth, is imposed more systematically and with more physical force, to persons like myself whom can actively avoid engaging the pattern, and object to its reasoning at every turn.  Within my own experiences of how subtle effects of speech can cause illogical mental conditioning, I have a real fear around what my children are repeatedly experiencing at Declan and Kate’s house, since Declan has been more and more frequently aggressively yelling at the children, which is the only way he has of preventing himself from violence towards them.  I have no evidence that he has been obedient to the court order in preventing himself from violence, apart from the fact of how easily he openly loses his temper now, when before he went on a course ordered by the court, he rarely yelled.  Zimma had already experienced Declan hitting him and me standing in the way of that to prevent it, however my younger sons have no memory of such things, and I have no way to aid their psychological processes to develop into drawing healthy conclusions.  The only conclusions which they are now being enabled, are either that only being abusive can win, or that the legislative justice system has been systematically robbing them of a safe loving home environment.  The police and the law courts and legal aid have this basic fact to answer to.  Many of these details normally ought not to be mentioned, yet I need to assert that the conditions of my family law case are extreme, in part because it gives validation to the system of rapes being promoted in the prison system, in which as many Australians who have met a former prison inmate are directly affected.

These facts, and others I have already mentioned, are most of the reasons why I initially had any problem with Declan and Kate being the residential care givers for my children.  The other problems are with Declan’s more general tendency to validate violence, and that they are both drinking heavily.  Recently I met one of their neighbours, by accident, who reports that it is obvious from a few houses away, that the regular screaming from Declan is beginning to make the children wise to their father’s inconsistencies.  However because all my applications to court have not been taken as the expression of a person whom is sane, and so therefore were dismissed as deluded, there has been no recourse for action.  The department of child safety will not intervene while a court case is current unless it is already so bad as there being clear evidence of physical abuse happening.

What seems, from my point of view, to be the case, is that the State police have one investigation, in which their main evidence is related to suspicions derived from the court case, and in knowledge that I was already under surveillance but not really knowing what for, and those suspicions of the State police, are ones which the ASIO/ASIS policing knows to be incorrect; but also that the ASIO/ASIS policing has been subject to the consequences of the State police making their own research independently, and seem not to have soon enough informed Queensland police of the evidence in the case of my former very good reputation as a mother.  However, I could be wrong in this.  It can also be said that there are police whom are taking me very seriously, and whom can have little or nothing to do with other police forces involvement.  In the middle of it all is also the AFP, whose suspicions are drug related, but whom also were asserting that I earn money as a prostitute, so ought to be funding my legal case myself.  A couple of nice policeman even introduced me to a prostitute of the sort who earns more money than most, as though to aid me in my family law case.  Then there are also a bunch of Army type guys, and a story I was told about all undercover policing being dependent upon SAS involvement with their work, but the Army type guys seem almost entirely uninformed about what sort of thing to be suspicious of me for.  So my every move is as a suspect.  Now, if, it might be that the police try to defame my witness of their work as a paranoid delusion, they ought to be able to prove that with my police files, and also ought to be able to prove it with the evidence of an expert witness whom has not been listening already to prejudiced reports against me, and whom actually can validate their assertions about my diagnosis against the DSM IV standards, as the legislation about expert evidence demands.  The Anti-Terrorist Legislation, which enables the police not to need to comply with all laws themselves in their daily operations, cannot also be applicable to the determinations of a court of law, otherwise the legislative justice system has already written itself out of any need to exist. (In which case Australians ought to all give a pat on the back to whoever it was who asserted that we needed such legislation for the sake of international relations with the USA, since that bit of legislation, and the one for the NT intervention into Aboriginal communities, and aspects of the most recent Family Law Act, when put together, provide evidence together of it being Australia where the prophesies of Islam become revealed, and so therefore that accountability of a promise to sustain the economy of home grown food supply, which all Muslims are bound by, has been handed to us on a platter: that is, if you believe that any such promise could ever have been real, or that it might not be applicable in fact to every indigenous community the world over, at one time or another.)(but can they charge me with sedition for pointing that out, which might be the question at the bottom of the insanity charges, if the insanity charges had not predated all three legislative changes?)I was told in Canberra, at the tent embassy in 2003, that the tent embassy receives protection from the AFP through buying drugs from certain factions of organised crime who have deals with corrupt members of the AFP.  I don’t know if that is true, I only know what I was told. 

It is the practise among criminals to make sure that every person whom witnesses a certain degree of criminal activity, has to be conditioned into a certain set of behaviours, including drug use.  There seems almost more efforts being made to impose culpability in witnessing crime, than there are in the fact of the original committing of crimes.  That is, there is more crime today committed so as to conceal crime, than for any other reason.  The concepts of being “complicit”, being “culpable” and being “condemned” in a religious sense, have no distinction among criminals.  At times even contesting any assertion at all is defined as being too far gone insane to accept the suffering equitable to that of the black community; and black youth are especially susceptible to that assertion about what defines their blackness.  The whole is the same as the classic patterns in which the Maffia are often very Religious, and as though they own the whole Catholic establishment.  That sort of idea is promoted openly among Australian criminals, that criminality has the upper hand over the mainstream Christian institutions, and therefore also within all the smaller newer Churches.  The idea is that even the Pope might confess to not being able to sustain Vatican City without the assistance of alms provided by criminals.  Usually the idea is presented within a form of expression in which it seems fully insane, and yet also viable, and so most persons whom have come in contact with the idea, are afraid to express it outside of criminal drug using contexts, in which it is presented as the single most important idea to ascribe to so as to avoid the police.  Perhaps after all, the police have been doing themselves a great disservice by enabling the dial-a-crowd type drug users and sellers to become mixed up with real left wing ideologists.

The ritualised abuse that was first described to myself and others in 1989, by a friend who then counselled at the Canberra Rape Crisis Centre, but it has not been possible outside of experiencing it, to discern what the nature of the psychological pattern which inhibits normal law and order was.  What happened to me at the tent embassy in January 2003, was that the process of that conditioning was engaged in by other residents at the tent embassy, after they had exposed their own involvement in drug crimes to me.  However what they were attempting to do (actively damage my psychological processes, such as many Aborigines report of having been done to them, or a relation, while camped at the tent embassy) was not taking effect, and subsequently I have been also followed by other criminals, whom have made further attempts.  In the total pattern which is of ritualised drug abuse, followed by ritualised rape, within physical conditions of sensory depravation caused by not going outside enough for a period of a few weeks, and not engaging with normal society, and then also they sodomise their victims, in a way which causes ignorance to unusual behaviour;  in those patterns what is most difficult is that they are accessing normal social patterns as the preliminary rituals.  That is how they engaged me, and I had to be very astute at the outset to realise what they were attempting, which I realised first on the third day. 

Most victims might not realise for a few weeks, unless it is happening within an imprisoned situation. The ritualised aspects are not normally weirdo stuff, but are normal social niceties, and social mores, sort of like the whole arrangement is just a posh tea party, or tea and cakes with the vicar after church, but with other drugs instead of tea and cake, and expectations of sexual involvement at the drop of a hat. As though being raped is equivalent to kneeling at the altar for communion.  The point is that the system of  social regulation they are accessing is not overtly criminal.  While my family assert that only fools get involved with that sort of situation, what they do not realise is that they are themselves equally vulnerable to anybody whom might try the same through use only of food and alcohol and without rape, but rather only suggestion of ideas about what is normal sexual behaviour perhaps.  The intention of the criminals is to hurt a person to the extent that if that person ever tries to inform anybody of what has been done, the reports will only manifest as though insanity.  It’s like being convinced that you are coping when you are clearly not able, or convinced that you are the guilty party of the original criminal intention. 

The techniques are used frequently in the prison system among the inmates, as a way of convincing themselves that they can be active in making social contributions even though they are fully inhibited from exactly that.  The thing is, that they never fully realised the technique on me, since nobody sodomised me, and I am not a drug addict, have rarely ever consumed alcohol, and am careful about my diet.  Also when being raped, seeming to go along with the situation, but while internally minding every detail within the regard that the whole situation is not to be trusted, seems to enable that the biological response is to sustain a clearer memory and certainty.  In fact, every time I openly assert the fact that I have not been sodomised, it happens that I become followed again by criminals who set about trying to, and have already four times had to rely upon one of the local Aboriginal men whom has been in prison, who found out that criminals were trying to organise somebody to rape me, and so offered to feign that he did a criminal act of sodomy to me, and to feign that I am now fully and totally corrupted and rendered incredible if I try to speak about what has happened.  That is the only safe social status for a person whom has witnessed a certain degree of drug crime, and is not themselves a drug user.  

In these I am inclusive even those whom become police informants, and so I must assert that it is with considerable personal risk that I am writing this.  The Aboriginal men I mention have really been very honourable towards me, right from the start at the tent embassy, where each of the Aboriginal men present when I camped there, had been mostly very respectful in communicating the situation to me.  That is, despite their having ventured to distinctly take their own advantage in the situation, it was always without trying to prevent my recall of the situation, as is the habit among those supporting organised crime.  The pressure some portions of the Aboriginal community were under to sustain the tent embassy, was that if they did not sodomise every person who camped there overnight, that their drug dealers would cause the police to stop them camping there, and steal all their money and belongings, as had been done to them shortly before my arrival to the Canberra Tent Embassy around new year 2003.  Their position is that, therefore, we at least have to pretend to.  I have tried repeatedly to openly express a different point of view in respect of law and order, and each time, all that has happened is that another, more dangerous sort of criminal, starts to follow me.  That is how it happens that I ever in the first place had any intimate relationship with any of the Aboriginal men whom have been in prison.  

In 2005, when I was actually raped by the more dangerous individual, (an English Rebel Bikie, with Japanese organised crime connections, and Neo-Nazi affiliations), it was after it was first noticed that I am still fully intelligent to the whole situation; and at the time I only escaped the sodomy by running away into a Mosque in the vicinity, and where he was too afraid to follow me.  I interrupted the Muslim men’s prayers and they helped me to get away.   Immediately after that was when the police surveillance of me fully increased.  I think that the bloke who raped me might have been also a police informant, perhaps known to the AFP, and perhaps even has been providing two different sets of information to different parts of the Australian police.  He certainly also regards himself as a source of information about the police to criminals. When I initially reported the matter to Queensland police, after being aided to escape by the men at Mosque, the policed seemed to recognise the perpetrator by name, as though somebody they regard to be on their side, and as though there was no possibility of their taking me seriously as soon as they had his name.  Immediately after an internal examination was made of me,  I had to sign a statement recognising that police have refused to prosecute the rape for me.  I have told ASIO about the particular two or three times and they are using my report about the situation as though evidence of insanity.  However the policing situation has dramatically improved, even while drafting this document, and also clearly in consequence of the federal election and Labor’s success.  So distinct is that alteration, that it must be wondered if there has been an immediate change in the mode of report writing which the police chiefs adjust to under Labor, maybe similarly to the Labor party having a house manager at the Lodge, and the Liberal-National co-alition having a Butler rather.  The actual rapist’s father had been a member of the Plymouth Brethren (similar to the exclusive brethren who funded the Howard government), and he was fully delusional that he was a real Nazi, like a ghost of the SS or something. Because of what happened at the tent embassy, and my subsequent retention of sanity, there had been a considerable interest among the Aboriginal community about my whole situation, including especially that incident.  However, it is categorically not in the interests of anybody’s sanity to want to know.

Aboriginal youth tend to be very easily coerced by drug dealers, into false belief that we are all susceptible to being abused by corrupt police; but when that false view is accepted, then the few corrupt police who really exist have the upper hand.  So there are portions of the Aboriginal community whom have begun to imagine that those corrupt police are the good police who are on their side, and that is why the youth are so vulnerable. This is why I tend not to make an issue out of the fact that I know I am under police surveillance.  At this time I have a concern to make certain that Zimma is not susceptible to the same sort of pattern. 

I recently ceased a relationship with an Aboriginal man who owns native title at Fraser Island and has asked me to marry him, only because I don’t want my children to be so very vulnerable as his have been.  There ought to be no reason to be afraid of police surveillance; and their evidence about me ought to be able to prove that I am a good mother even. There is neither any reason to suppose that we have to deny the police surveillance only so as to be safe from the police.  What seems to me to be happening in the Aboriginal community, is extreme levels of the sorts of abuse I am describing.  Within the abuse is being sustained a perversion of indigenous culture.  In the same way that there can be a perversion of tea and toast with the vicar, there are perversions of the signs of adherence to Aboriginal cultural tradition.  For example, there has been a wholesale perversion, in urban contexts, of understanding what the actual biological difference between black and white skin is, but when indigenous Australian cultural tradition, where intact, sustains an excellent set of lessons about that difference.  (in the story of how the swans became black)  The sources of the perversions to culture can be traced to be mainly drug suppliers, and right wing prison inmates, yet therein we must fully ascertain, as a whole community, white and black, what level of involvement the police, and prison employees, have had.

It might seem to be the most obvious madness that a person who is under police surveillance would go and establish themselves to be a Muslim, as I have been since later in 2005.  The fact of the matter is that I had already begun to learn about Islam, but was not likely to have openly expressed myself as a Muslim, for the exact reason of not wanting to draw further negative police attention upon myself.  However, after I had needed to use the Mosque to escape from the person who did rape me and then had been trying to set up a situation to sodomise me in, it was sort of too late to avoid that kind of negative attention from the police.  So today I am fully furnished with the identity of being a threat to national security as a potential Islamic terrorist even.  (I even wear a veil for Hijab sometimes: but while the Muslim community at first were very insistent upon the need for the veil, as a self discipline and assertion of social status, when everybody realised the extent to which I am being policed, they fully withdrew from any real expectation that I would wear the veil- hijab is the internal attitude not necessarily only the material coverage: actually I really have a preference for being well covered.)I have a bit more information to provide about the nature of the identity politics and how that affects the indigenous community in respect of policing.  I want to provide the information I have partly because it is both myself and one of my first cousins, whom have harboured belief that our ancestors probably include indigenous Australians, and in both of us the identification lead to serious psychological abuse by criminals. Therefore I know that having the internal self identification of being indigenous, can lead to being more susceptible to being abused through criminals, and through corrupt policing, if it is not also accompanied by full compliance with traditional cultural sanctions, or the full level of sanctions of a modern Religion being held to.  I have had to access both so as to sustain myself, and most of Aboriginal Australia whom are not alcoholic and not experiencing undue domestic violence, are working to adhere to both traditional culture and mainstream Christianity, despite mainstream Christianity having its own set of abusive forms.  However, this part of my yarn, really ought to be placed more properly into the whole sequence of how it comes to be that the police have had cause to have me under their suspicion, and thus surveillance, in the first place, and I want to put that whole in chronological order, starting back now at not long after I went on that first peace protest.   I will go over the details I how I came to be involved with the Aboriginal community, and how I came to convert to Islam.

Clearly, my employment at Community Radio 2XX, would have engaged police surveillance teams, since the first of the public radio stations all began as draft resistors radio during the Vietnam war, and the reports of witnessing police surveillance have never diminished among those involved with community radio, except when the people involved are clearly already also involved with drug related crime. (Strangely enough drug dealers are very well equipped with belief in the providence of police corruption:- perhaps a fact of the knowledge they rely upon which ought to be minded better by the mainstream community so as to prevent police corruption.)

In 1988 I became a member of the group called Women Against Racism, and during 1988 Women Against Racism became more involved with Aboriginal Land Rights issues, and I only joined after I was present at a Traditionally Oriented Aboriginal Corroboree at Kurnell, on 25th and 26th January 1988, in the company of a few of the members of Women Against Racism, and one other friend.  I am regarded by traditional Aborigines in every state as being beholden to uphold their laws through my presence there that day, and therefore to have had an obligation to learn about Aboriginal culture, and make its laws and obligations also my own.  In particular it had been noticed by the Aboriginal community, that (apart from Eleanor Williams who was then already within Aboriginal Kinship cultural belief), I was the only white person present to respond to the ceremony without demonstrating excessive fear of my own comprehension. The community obligations in connection with that Corroboree are respected by most Aboriginal communities, and also connect to another Corroboree held in 2000 during the Olympics, and any Aboriginal person who is accountable to the work of such important Corroborees, can hold me within that accountability also.  I can equitably therefore dismiss all my mother’s efforts to prove that my interest in whether any Aboriginal ancestors can be actually traced, is only insanity; because the traditionally oriented Aborigines tend to regard that any person born in Australia, and particularly if there is any mixed ethnic background at all, could well be a person whose Spirit is indigenous, and so has the right to prove themselves worthy of a birth right to learn within the Aboriginal tradition.  This position is not agreed upon by other Aborigines, and particularly those whom have right wing politics, and whom also, through their family’s politics, were not victimised by police in youth, and so could receive a decent education.  My attendance at that Corroboree had a pronounced immediate impact on my psychology, yet not an altering one, but a drawing out of something I can recognise in myself as always having been a part of me.  It is indeed fully equitably able to be described as an identification of strong affiliation with marsupials, eucalypts, and other natural native Australian phenomenon. Something like an understanding of the basic principals of safety in the bush, having been built in, and then strengthened above other personal characteristics.  It is a set of observance capacities which are equally useful in City contexts also, even though harder to sustain within Cities.

 Thankfully there are very many well educated Aborigines, not all of whom are right wing, and if anybody has any interest in the matter of why to, or why not to, interest oneself in the Aboriginal point of view on Australian politics, I can recommend a book recently published by a man called Bruce Pascoe, which goes into some of the history of his own region, including Batman’s Treaty.  The facts of whether any white Australian might have indigenous ancestry, range between oral history records of brutal rapes followed by infanticide; and organised negotiated marriages in which Aboriginal women might even have been lucky enough to have been well looked after by a white man, but not usually recognised as a second wife, and rather awarded the status of a servant; with every possible scenario in between being a part of our collective Australian history.  My political position among the indigenous community is that Reconciliation needs to recognise that fact, and in most of my assertions of this, I am not well respected by the folk I have met who head up the Reconciliation councils.  The point of this paragraph in respect of the police, is that one of the outcomes of my having made a specific set of political arguments among the black community, has been that of the police branding me as though they are certain of me being a racist.  It has been argued that only white persons, or those without Aboriginal cultural upbringing, might take the sort of political position on racial politics that I have been. Because of that branding, I really need to clarify my position.  It is not, as the police seem to believe, that I am potentially a trouble maker who they might need to arrest for sedition because of the way my writing stirs up racial relations.  That perspective however, is what the main instigator of abuse at the tent embassy presented to my mother, and my mother bought in on.  The Aboriginal persons involve have very very bad family reputations among the indigenous community, although I have met a relation of the main assailant who wasn’t too bad.

When I first went to camp at the tent embassy (I was there to escape from the “summer nats” crowd at the camp site I was booked and paid into), it was assumed of me, that the only reason I knew anything about Aboriginal culture, or might want to associate with blacks, must be because I wanted to claim a black identity as though to claim of being owed by every white person.  I have argued against that expectation repeatedly among the black community, and my position that it is as basic as white racism, and not at all a positive discrimination to regard all whites as in debt to all blacks automatically.  Many black skin persons have been either being set up to seem to hate all whites, or are actively offering their own real hate of any white person, as though an excuse for whites to blame every black, which they imagine then gives them the excuse to blame every white.  Its an obviously ridiculous series of social relations in which those who refuse to play ball are often who becomes labelled as racists.  The game is as idiotic as the fact that the woman who told my mother that I had defiled her culture and was having a delusion of being a black skin person, had also told me that she was so sorry to see a good person like my mother unable to admit to having indigenous ancestry.  I do not know how many other paler skin persons have been similarly set up. It was the report of my mother to a psychiatrist, that I had a delusion of being black, that caused the diagnosis of schizophrenia, despite me asserting that my real belief was only of possible and probable ancestry, which can be true without there being certification on the record.  There is some level of belief within the indigenous community that persons who try to breach community confidence like that, are in fact descendants of an older and smaller invasion from China.  There is a bit of archaeological evidence to support that, but no anthropological surveys have been made within that question.

I have repeatedly argued that if we all, as white Australians, continue to refuse to say so when black Australians are trying to take advantage of us not wanting to be racist, and not wanting the social branding of being a racist, then by giving an advantage that was not earned to black persons, only on the basis of skin colour (rather than real dialogue about who grew up within what social conditioning to access what resources), we just wind up buying into the real racists game.  If we do not say what the real situation is, then white racists seek for their own evidence of blacks taking advantage of whites trying not to be racists, and use the story to the advantage of the cause of racial segregation. However, if we say what is and is not appropriate for us as white persons, as well as opening avenues for black persons to communicate their needs, then the racists have less opportunity to paint the situation inaccurately.  This is extremely important, because so many Australians have swallowed the Howard governments intervention into a situation which little was really known about.  In fact the statistics of child abuse on record, is of greater child abuse in the electorate of Benelong than in any of the remote indigenous communities enduring the intervention.

Obviously every self decent black person will agree that it is wrong to accuse any person only on the basis of any biological feature.  In prisons, the slightly different regulation patterns of the physiology of persons with indigenous Australian racial characteristics, is taken to be just another means of abuse each other on the basis of biological facts.  I know of this first hand from a white man who was in prison, and experienced other prisoners identifying that he has Aboriginal ancestry, without him every disclosing that himself.  Being a white indigenous person goes under being a black indigenous person in prison hierarchies, unless the white person portrays themselves as though an extreme racists. Portions of the black community are well aware of those facts.  In the prisons, the only persons with a lower social status that whites who have indigenous ancestry, and are not wanting to be racist towards blacks, are, of course, those black Aborigines who refuse to be racist towards whites.  The consequence of refusing to engage in negative racial discrimination, is to be either: falsely branded as a paedophile; or falsely branded as mentally ill; and usually both; in which most inmate prefer to be falsely taken to be Neo-Nazi drug addicts and prostitutes, which is partly why persons like the Englishman who raped me, can seem to be getting away with it.

Dad has asked me not to speak to him ever again about my “(his words) . . . deep insights into Aboriginal culture”, and so it has been a somewhat difficult decision to decide to send this document to my relations.  But I feel somewhat of an obligation to let everybody know why it was in the first instance that I really began to identify myself to be among indigenous Australians.  For many years, many of my white friends had told me of knowledge of having one or two indigenous ancestors, and the general discussions around that fact, tend to orient into deciding not to try to obtain an indigenous identification on the record, because there is only a limited quantity of hand outs available, and blacks need it more than whites.  I thought about that for many years, and eventually decided that it is a rubbish position to take, because what the black community need, is for the public identification of being indigenous, to become more completely associated with being a law abiding, hard working, culturally sophisticated, financially enabled, Australian.  The fact that my own reputation has been so fully trashed only by asking around about whether anybody knows of our family having indigenous ancestry, and openly agreeing with indigenous persons whom assert that it seems likely by our appearance (and is definitive in other biological characteristics which I don’t really know how to describe outside of Aboriginal culture, without a very long winded Religious explanation of the bio-chemistry of meta-physics); is actually evidence of my position being necessary.  The whole country needs to work against racism and if that means that more white persons are openly identified as indigenous, and more blacks identified as right wing, then that is what is necessary.

Frankly it is obvious that most white persons with indigenous ancestry won’t identify only because they are scared of having their reputations trashed, and the black community don’t always know which of whites are amenable to their needs and which whites are the real racists; which is only making all indigenous children extremely vulnerable to disbelieving the mainstream white cultural standards.  This is with the exception of those traditionally oriented people who still live their culture, and still teach it as often as possible because of perceiving that teaching Aboriginal culture to persons like my self, who can also teach the lessons further out into the community as well as teaching our own children, is the means to ensure cultural survival.  Those persons, the traditional people, really might have a very valid gripe against whites who refuse to identify as indigenous, despite knowing of indigenous ancestry; but those with real reason for a gripe, tend not to ever make accusations within their real knowledge base, which is one of the strongest signs of good cultural retention.  I believe that it is important not to let other indigenous blacks blame the white community for their own behaviour, since that has become socially disabling for many black youth, even if it has been successful for a few academics.  Their dependence upon such strategies taints their capacity to interact normally within the mainstream community.  The best way to alter the situation is for many more white Australians to adopt indigenous identification, whether blacks like it or not.  For example, Aboriginal knowledge about Australian ecology, would be aided to become more mainstream, and thus strengthened, in the instance of white ecologists with indigenous ancestors defining their work as belonging equitably to the indigenous tradition. 

The biggest difficulty is with those indigenous people whom encourage whites to adopt an indigenous self identity, but whom then introduce the same white person to friends who hate all white persons, and especially if there is an identification with black culture, as distinct from indigenous culture.  There is a pattern of entrapment, regulated by drug dealers, in which many Aboriginal persons sort of trade in indigenous identification, and I have had to wonder if Sandra Caling might have been caught up in something like that.  The patterns of criminals trading in the credibility of indigenous hunter gather identification, as though to excuse their own poor social compliance, are dominated by the non-Aboriginal portions of organised crime, including Japanese, Malay, and Indonesian, as well as affiliations with American and British organised crime.  The pattern seems to be that Japanese and most other Asian criminals concerns are on top, then British, then American, then Aboriginal, then the Islamic Asian under that; that is how it seems to those involved, and how it was portrayed to me by the man who raped me.  The information I obtained has a high value among those Aboriginal men who are affected by the prison conditions, which is really all Aboriginal men.  An acquaintance who visited the prisons for his employment, and was set up by inmates, to seem to be a drug smuggler, was then on that basis bashed and raped by prison security guards, and those sorts of stories are not uncommon, though rarely spoken.  Why I am providing this sort of information is to validate that my reasoning for associating within the indigenous community was not only ignorance and immaturity, but a real concern to change the social conditions because of a perception that the current climate around racial relations has negative affects on every one of us.

The main reason I continue to try to get the information I have out into a more public arena, is because of my real concerns about child protection, and how the organised crime is using all ex-prison inmates to influence the indigenous community, into patterns of behaviour which put children at risk.  The basic facts of the problems which are at their clearest indication through the prison system, is that it is not a black problem, but a whole community problem.  It is not even a black dominated problem.  It is a fact which has a negative affect on Australia’s reputation internationally even. (exemplified in the South Park cartoon portraying Mel Gibson as a sad- masochist)  So I intend to continue putting the information I have, about what is going wrong in the prisons for example, out into the public arena despite every instigation that it might be only my own insanity; and I would like to be sure that real clinical specialists in counselling those whom have been through the forms of abuse I am describing, are involved with the defining of my own mental health.  The full scale of evidence from inside the prisons, is of a systemic pattern of trading upon everybody’s reputations, in which every person’s biological reactions to extremes of abuse, are being allowed to determine who is last in line, and so branded with the reputation of being the paedophiles.  Once out of prison the former inmates tend to continue to be obsessed with seeking out anybody who is vulnerable to being branded as though a paedophile, and victimising that person.  Usually the accusations are not being openly made, but often also they are.  What tends to make a person susceptible is really only lack of money, and strangely enough partly because of that, many drug users are more afraid than necessary of getting off drugs.  If they were not afraid for their reputations, then they would more readily just inhibit their drug use by decreasing their disposable income.  Because of the victimisation of indigenous communities, by the police, a larger percentage of Aboriginal men are psychologically scarred than among the rest of the community.  That is why the situation I became caught up in at the tent embassy ever manifested.  

Clearly there are political ramifications in respect of the federal governments intervention in the Northern Territory, within the whole story I am defining through my own experience, but which is similar to many other persons.  Consider this, if anybody is being falsely branded as paedophiles, and rendered unable to escape that label as I have been, then it is most likely to be those whom are more vulnerable than I am psychologically, and whom therefore, are the most in need of examples of other people who can overtly tell “ we were given that label too and it was not true, and will never be true, about us either”.  Consider the risks of children becoming labelled as paedophiles, as has been happening in the Northern Territory, and in other indigenous communities.  If a child’s father was victimised in prison, and the child then attempts to forgive their father, what could the outcome manifest, unless the child is fully enabled to sustain their own personal safety within receiving real information about what abuse was inflicted upon their father and why it was wrong.  Once I aided Declan to avoid a prison sentence for the reason that I could not foresee having enough money while in a relationship with him, so as that our sons would be enabled safety of comprehension of what might happen.

What I need to add for my extended family who read this, is that when my mother fell into the trap of making an effort to avoid herself becoming branded as a racist, in which the only alternative being given to her was to accept the point of view that I had committed an act of flagrant racism, it was with clear intention on the part of certain criminals (and whether or not they were the Aboriginal perpetrators is less relevant) to set up our whole family as accessible to being blamed for perpetrating racism.  The tent embassy are equally damning of Mum for her attitude to me, as they are of any other fact of the matter.  However Mum went on to reported me to my then psychiatrist as having been culturally abusive to Aborigines and simultaneously delusional that I had black skin, since I had been identifying with indigenous culture.  The threat being made against her, to brand her as the racist, was of course covert, but also being made with a great deal of pressure.  It is sort of not surprising that she fell into her own game really, considering how overt she has been at exactly those sort of strategies against myself; of telling a set of facts one way to one person and in the opposite way to another.  What she might not realise is that I had no cause or want to have engaged in participating with setting her up, and have had no advantage from the fact that she was set up.  I would not be opening out any issue of my relationship with my mother being bad, if that had not already been fully identified by the Aboriginal community independently of my own gripes, during early 2003.  They might even have done her a favour in setting her up to it, since it proves that she did not do this to me in the first place.  Similarly those with extreme right wing politics among organised crime, have done the same favour for the larger Aboriginal community.

At some point later I realised that the only way to avoid being tricked by those blacks who want to engage in identity trading around how far black a person’s culture is, is to let the really bad blacks brand you as a racist, since they are going to no matter what.  The argument of black blacker blackest and how far black is black is nonsense since we might as well ask how white is white, how red red hair, or how green green eyes.  The real perpetrators of negative racial based discrimination, eventually show themselves up in their efforts to use skin colour alone as though to prove that the world owes them a righteousness of status equitable with Royalty.  Use of the fact that whites are white, as though to excuse drug taking among other crimes, ought to be able to be opposed without becoming branded as a racist, which is why I have been openly speaking out.  I have, thereby, discovered that there are such persons as real neo-nazis who work to put the black population up to that sort of behaviour.  The reason I discovered that such persons exist, is because they are foremost in wanting to prevent any body among the Aboriginal community from realising the whole context of the argument, and my real belief and behaviour within this context.

There are many youths, both white and black, whose parents are often trying not to be racists, and whom are being made vulnerable because of how our society is regulated definitions of racism, or failing to regulate such rather.  The sort of dialogue which could happen within the information I am providing here, might already be fully necessary for many youth.  But one of the reasons why I am including all this political and social analysis, is for anybody who knows me, and whom might also be under police surveillance, in which these sorts of pressures are always made worse.  You need to know what the traps are to avoid, and these are the sorts of entrapment patterns which are likely to be used upon any person who associates with me.  For any of those whom I send this to, it could prove worth while to make your own applications under the Freedom of Information Act, quite independent from any application which I might make in the future.  And for that reason I will delay making this document available to the police through the internet, but only until about the 17th of January.

 Obviously, I also ought to advise you all that the courts have not made a decision about myself yet, (whether or not they are qualified to make the decision about my mental health), and so maybe you ought not believe all I am writing without making your own examinations of the evidence.  I believe that if there is anything the police could accuse me with, it is possibly only that I might have written accusingly about how far too far the police are letting criminals overtly incriminate themselves, rather than working to prevent crime.  I would prefer a zero tolerance policy myself.  Anybody should be able to expect that the police would openly address the matter of providing information about what is not appropriate to write in public consumer contexts and why, rather than sneaking about spending resources on preventing a person like myself from becoming a writer, only on the basis of political and religious affiliations.

Some of the Queensland Aboriginal population, who do not like my political position, have tended to try to brand me as though I am an out and out right wing racist, and that has only really been possible because I am not known here in Queensland.  I don’t actually know if the police are causing that, or were caused to suspect that I could be a neo-nazi because of the few blacks who didn’t like me.  But even the police clearly are not certain as to whether I really believe in the left wing politics I associate myself with.  Partly perhaps because of having become a Muslim, but then there have also been assertions by the police that maybe I am not a believing Muslim, because I associate with those Muslims who also have left wing politics, and who happen usually also to be who believes in Jesus as Christians.  I truly believe that the false branding which happened, was the result of those drug users at the tent embassy, having fallen into a false believe being propagated by their drug dealers in organised crime.  Clearly, because I never showed any inclination to cover up the fact that there were a few persons portraying real organised crime as a left wing political position, (although many left wing activists find themselves taking refuge within a false identity of being involved in organised crime, since that sort of face tends to alleviate negative police attention),  there have been Aboriginal persons being ‘sponsored’ by organised crime, to prevent me from providing information to those whom can prevent drug use in the indigenous community.

I might have already mentioned that the set of Islamic groups banned in the USA as potential terrorists includes mainly the far right wing of Islam, while that group banned here in Australia, tends to include mainly the far left wing of Islam.  That fact backs up a theory knowable in Muslim communities, about which, or whom among, indigenous Muslims will fulfil a certain prophesy of Islam.  It’s the kind of information which is nobody’s business to be playing politics with, or even assuming of as able to influence anybody outside of the Religious context.  But apparently there are folk in the God-fearing USA, (Mormons were founded by a fellow who claimed to be able to reconcile Qur’an with the Bible and many members of the Church of Later Day Saints exert open and active influence within the Islamic Circle of North America, while also the Baptists have their own interests among a different pattern of schooling in Islam.), who want to prove that the main part of the Islamic prophesy, which is about a massive exorcism from the world of all child abuse, won’t be done by any other people but Americans, since their economic rationalism seems to be based upon the idea of a debt which Islam prophesies will be owed to whoever successfully undertakes the task. (whatever an exorcism really is! –if it’s the real one it’s a cure and not just going around blaming other countries)  There is evidence of manipulation of who it might be whom fulfils one particular trajectory within Islam, dating back to Christopher Columbus and earlier, but that sort of manipulation was only ever done by those whom had no real faith in God.  It’s all a bit ridiculous really, since who would want the task, which is as like as not to ensure living life as a pauper, since many persons who are extremely wealthy, seem to imagine that it is unavoidable for obtaining money to fail to cause harm to children.  That belief is sustained throughout the East Asian economy, and by many Freemasons, however it fully depends upon how money is being spent, and what the advertising industry engages in, etc.

You all ought to know that there are portions of my writing in the internet in Muslim contexts, in which the police might have presupposed trouble between my own analysis and that of more mainstream Muslims, who support an American based trajectory of the prophesy, but when my own analysis has no real counter to the ideals of Americans in becoming Muslims and ridding the world of paedophilia. I will object to that functional role of performing exorcisms of paedophilia, being forced upon anybody though, and particularly being forced upon who might enable monetary profits being engaged through fabrication of that task.  Realistically the whole action of the prophesy, must be understood to be necessary to become conducted in every location among every population, but not until the point at which that population becomes able to comprehend the story, or story cycle, in which child abuse is fully disproven, and thus cannot reoccur. The idea is not to convince persons whom have never encountered the abuse that it is not real, but to convince those whom have encountered it, that there was only ever extreme disadvantage to the perpetrators.  My own analysis tends to be regulated by the experience of Aboriginal cultural values in regard to allegorical teaching, that we ought presuppose that every decent story has some immediate application in our own life upon our hearing it, (even if the immediate application is only to know that it ought not be repeated), and that if no validation of life sustaining principals can be sourced, that the story ought not be repeated. 

Within that understanding, I can clarify that there has been a story between myself and an Aboriginal man, in which domestic violence was socially expected, but prevented, and in which children were safe, despite the worst allegations having been made against both of us.  What could not be resolved simultaneously was for parenthood to be made sacrosanct for single parents who are without community, and/or family, support.  However the story cycle is not yet fully complete in its potential for a happy resolution, and in that I am a little unforgiving of those whom were not inclined to be supportive of me within knowledge of the situation.  The process of defining modern mythos which influences the popular collective subconscious, is of course what the dreamtime is all about, and the definitions are based in real world life stories.  Hopefully there is another one around in which there are much better outcomes than now existing in my own.

Now I know that Dad says that every part of Religious belief is purely irrelevant to the policing matter, but not if there are police whom use Religious beliefs to regulate their policing policies, as the Americans seem to.  Dad is also presupposing that Religious belief has no scientific foundations in his assertion.  When policing is conditioned by Religious affiliations, it seems to cause that their policing of me is both an improvement and potentially larger problem. They could fully respect my sanity if they chose to, since my pattern in the few real psychotic episodes that happened, was aligned with that of an uninformed religious experience, of the sort that is branded as insane only because it is outside of the sanction of a religious institution.  The scientific description is in respect of an increase in natural production of the same neuro-transmitters, which tend to decrease in production if supplanted by any psycho-active drug.  The problematic situation might have arisen, (but has not) since if a policeman regards the law of God, within their own interpretation rather than through real Religious understanding, of distinctions between individual accountability and social or cultural accountability, to be above the legislation of Nation states.   Obviously the issue is that a civil engineer, or a farmer, is not quite so accountable in the public interests, to need to believe in the legislation, as is a policeman.  Even school teachers and doctors have more space to avail themselves of interpretation of the relationship between religiosity and legislature, than a policeman or a lawyer might.

As to how I became a real fairdinkum Muslim, (as though being a Gubborigine (white blackfella) was not bad enough, without also then becoming an Aussie Mussie), I will try to be as brief as possible, but this situation does warrant some way of an explanation provided.  (Even if most of you are too afraid of being indoctrinated into Islam to listen, either that or just politically biased against real Religious belief in God: but I prefer the first fear since that is the one the police are more likely to sponsor.) Clearly what needs to be said about my identifying within Aboriginal culture, is that I would never have so much as opened my mouth about what my Nanna said to me, about our nose shape etc, or about what Dad’s second cousins said about Grandmother’s father, and Mum said about Betty and Barb staying out of the sun etc, if anybody had ever given me any indication that identifying with the blacks would cause me any trouble in respect of my children.  However, with openly identifying as a Muslim, I knew what trouble might happen, and so did not overtly ever mention my beliefs until the shit had already hit the fan and been spread all round. 

The first thing that influenced me in the direction of enquiring into Islamic belief, was reading the Auto-biography of Malcom X, which was set for me as prescribed reading in year twelve.  Later on, and right up until I left Canberra in late 2002, (we were back for a Christmas visit when at the tent embassy), I had a group of friends who are in a group which provides religious sort of instruction, that bases itself upon the teaching of a bloke called George Ivanovitch Gurdjieff.  All his writing is at the National Library if anybody wants to research this.  It is a system of instruction into Religious belief in which the commentary is provided as a science not a religion.  That is, it is religion taught as a psychology. 

The long and the short of it is that Gurdjieff was a Muslim who taught within an Islamic structure but did not teach that he is a Muslim.  (Maybe soon I might take a leaf out of that book for myself, except that of course that might only serve to make it seem all the more as though the prophesy is being revealed here in Australia rather than America, since the prophesy includes assertion that Muslims will not be able to openly identify as such.)  Gurdjieff was connected with a Salafi school of Islam, which is one of the main four schools, but that least favoured by the Wahabis running the show at Mecca.  However his teaching is still today recognised to belong within Islam.  It was an attempt to make an expression of portions of Qur’anic teaching in a way which could be comprehended well by those raised within a Western European tradition.  However, the way that the lessons are regulated, requires any persons reading Gurdjieff’s work, to have contact with at least one person who has read Qur’an, and is an informed believer in Islam, and known to be a real Muslim by other Muslims.  So when Gurdjieff passed away only small portions of the many groups in the larger society which he had established, were continued within an Islamic tradition. 

The rest of the groups using the Gurdjieff teaching material are defined as occultists rather than as belonging within Religious definition.  The folk I know down in Canberra, are like a break away group which decided to divine for their own selves that the truth is occultist rather than religious.  Basically, they messed with my head, including through use of homeopathic remedies, radio transmission technology, and giving me reading material and which needs to be read after a few facts established about a persons capacity to sustain themselves with money.  There is a book which is used to test who might be likely to develop symptoms of insanity from involving themselves too far within the Gurdjieff teaching, or involving oneself in the more essential aspects which usually take years of psychological preparation to teach, or involving oneself without appropriate sanction through leadership, and they gave it to me at the outset of my enquiry about what they were up to, and then they blamed all their own madness, caused by failing to follow their own instructions from the American Gurdjieff Society, on me.  Mum has met the homeopath among that group, who is named Richard Conrick, and his wife also, but might not know that Ruth Flemming (aka Ruth Thompson and Ruth Hodgkin), who my sister knows too, is also in that same group.  Strangely enough, within that very same group there are a few too many bizarre coincidences of secretive attachment within the Aboriginal community.  Richard seems to have completely missed the point, that in 1999, as well as being late against the directive from the American teacher, as to the timing of working with myself, (Richard’s wife wanting to put on a concert took precedence then, without that information being given to the American teacher.), he was treating me with homeopathic medicines for stress incontinence, which I reported as having had since childhood, and had reported that the only improvements in the condition were from childbirth, clearly indicating that the problem was one form of prolapse rather than another; but at the same time was attempting to assess my psychological parameters so as to discern if I could begin the Gurdjieff instruction lessons, at my then, slightly older than usual age for such lessons to commence.  In fact, having a Marxist analysis can form a part of the real preparation, as can science study, and real lessons in Aboriginal cultural tradition.

What happened was that during my first episode of real mental illness, I was experiencing an intense fear about why that group of people had suddenly turned against me.  In retrospect it seems that they might have had some bad dreams about finding themselves in the wrong in connection to me, and then proceeded to make their dreams come true.  Later, beginning at the start of 2001, I began to do my own research into the teaching methodology of Gurdjieff.  Eventually I got to the nuts and bolts of it all, and discovered that the group of folk I knew, was breaking all the cardinal rules; and that within the lessons of Gurdjieff is planted enough information to prevent yourself succumbing to being harmed by those sort of people, once involve with them.  I did try to communicate all this to my parents, but they seem fairly well convinced that I have lived my life like somebody else, and I really am at a loss as to know how to alter that situation.  Among the nuts and bolts of the Gurdjieff teaching, is, of course, the basic internal consistency which sanity depends upon, and within that consistency is the information about who Gurdjieff himself learned from, and so it is not too difficult a task really to source the whole structure of the Gurdjieff groups back into Islam.  Gurdjieff is just a bloke who was usually regarded in his own lifetime, as a crackpot by Europeans and Americans, but was also paid loads of money by rich families to help get their kids sober, and was otherwise a very wealthy trader, who was in fact highly regarded throughout the middle east and India, and even in parts of China and Tibet.  The information he provided is basic to all three Abrahamic Religions, but mixes itself more overtly with Hinduism, to make it more palatable among other European crackpot types.  Sort of like a set up to disguise real Religion as just another eccentricity.  It seems even to suit me, and is compatible with both indigenous Australian belief and Christianity.

 Researching the Gurdjieff story really settled down my fears, and gradually I have found that the key to the whole thing is that one of the books he wrote sort of dissembles belief in modern European culture, to the extent that the reader really does become crazy unless they can also believe in Jesus. Lucky for me I always had certainty in Jesus, if no other part of Religious teaching.  I mean, nobody could assert that Jesus is not the good guy in every story mentioning him, and that is regardless of whether you believe in Christianity or not.  In fact, it is also true that the extent to which despair can settle in on a person who flounders while reading the Gurdjieff teaching material, means that the reading of the parts which un-stick belief in ones own culture, need to be regulated by a process of prayer and self-discipline, which is usually only possible through a known Religious teacher.  (prayer = meditation:- normal in the Gurdjieff society is to wake up before dawn and pronounce and comtemplate the mantra “I am” at dawn, which is a Judaic prayer used frequently also by Muslims and Christians.) But because I did not have such a person available to me, it just by accident happened that I found my beliefs becoming regulated by the involvement I have had within the Aboriginal community.  That includes the fact that the Corroboree I was at in 1988 was made specifically for the purpose of imposing certain aspects of Aboriginal culture upon every Australian born person.  As I said, most Aborigines who are old enough have heard of the event, and have an extremely high level of regard for the fact that I was in attendance at it. 

I also relied very heavily upon the reading I did at University about Aboriginal culture, and went back into the anthropology texts and did my own research to learn what the necessary cultural signs are to be able to relate the Gurdjieff texts accurately with Aboriginal culture and belief, and become able to communicate within Aboriginal culture.  My affiliations with indigenous Christians are very strong, and I am welcome enough to blow in every now and again, even at the Aboriginal Jehovah’s Witness Kingdom Hall up the road, so as to relate my own interpretations within the Religous mainstream, as I was also made welcome by the Aboriginal Salvos out in Ipswich.  Although I am more likely to go to a Muslim women’s group.  What has happened is that my fears became unstuck from need to adhere to mainstream social values, by what I had read and its influence on my psychology; but then to regulate behaviour within structured self discipline, I needed a replacement set of fears.  So I had to engage with the Aboriginal world since that was the only other set I knew at until connecting with other Muslims.  But now later, in having become a Muslim, I also am provided with a set of cultural regulation patterns in which to hold I can hold with interpretation of fear, yet keep fear silenced also, that have a more neat fit within mainstream Australian than Aboriginal culture tends to. However, I now fall into a strange category of being a potential terrorist, and what is more, a terrorist who is armed with a book that drives people to insanity; and then I have been trying to prove myself as a writer, so it is really only to be expected that the police might want to watch over me. However, they have no right to interfere with my motherhood. 

That is why I want to make an application under the Freedom of Information Act, even if it places me in so much debt that I have to work full time just to pay it all back.  (FoI material can be billed after it is provided, though I do not know of police enabling that.). Critically the whole situation has caused that I have become very sensitive to the way in which Aboriginal men are being treated in the prisons, and there seems to be an overt effort being made by the police to prevent me disseminating the information that has been provided to me by Aboriginal men who wanted for me, as an educated white person, to make their story available to mainstream Australians.  The fact is that I do not know any other person without an disabling addiction, or whom has not been more extremely psychologically scarred by the process of acquiring the information, who carries the full set of knowledge which I have.  Sadly within the local black community, most persons have been conditioned to anticipate that either this story must be incorrect if told by a white person, or that it ought not be told.  However I have a “temporary marriage” within traditional culture, to an initiated Pitjintjatjara man, who is a qualified ecologist, and traditional owner at Uluru, and who has placed me under an obligation among his own people in respect of what I have learned (from many sources) about the prison conditions, so I am fully obligated to be exposing this story.  His daughter is married into Yothu Yindi, and there are a number of Aboriginal communities in the Northern Territory whom are mindful of my situation.

The police have concerns about the fact that there are soon (and already) being released from prison about 80 Aboriginal men whom have converted to Islam while in prison.  I have an immediate need not to continue having to associate with such men, only for the sanctity of my own recovery processes, since they are usually in extreme distress, and likely to try to undermine the process of exposing the full scale of detrimental prison conditions, even when they are wanting to portray themselves as having had a terribly hard time.  Although Islamic belief can short circuit that sort of covering over of crime, so clearly that pattern is already changing.  What Aboriginal men are communicating to me, is information that is quite shocking, and relates to the whole area of government policy around child protection, as well as other criminal law matters and policing.  I am planning to provide that information somehow formally to groups to as many social welfare organisations as is possible, and perhaps this document might become a part of that process. 

The detail of the information I need to provide is mostly already in this document, and amounts in essence to the fact that there is one set of persons whom are being branded as having committed paedophilia who did not, and are also being branded as insane, as though to punish since convictions are impossible; while simultaneously there is another group of persons who imagine that the real child rapists, are being enabled to get away with their crimes on that account.  One of the related phenomena is that men who are released on parole, are often in a state of mind of believing that they cannot sustain themselves outside of prison, unless they become causal to another person becoming convicted and imprisoned.  Within that basic belief which accords certain behaviours, they tend to seek not to ensure that child abusers are convicted, since none of their mates inside what to share a prison cell with a perpetrator of child abuse.  A friend who worked with prison inmates described prisons to me as alike to leper colonies of drug addicts.

Clearly also there are implications for the brothel industry, and all brothels and prostitutes must be held accountable to the public health within these facts.  I tend to believe that the organised prostitutes unions will be most likely of any contemporary organisations to want to become actively involved to change the social conditions I am describing, and that is despite the fact that many of such people are most likely to be first endangered by any organised crime war in respect of these facts.  I have been befriended by a woman who had been working as a prostitute and who started sleeping on the streets so as to enable herself to give up heroin use.  She is exceptionally astute, and was then recognising that she had begun to show signs of recall memory loss, and so was looking for a person to provide all her information to.  She let me know the following information, some of which I have validated with another woman I knew in Canberra, who has worked as a prostitute for a long time.  That part I validated is that prostitutes who are mothers can earn more money, or supply pimps with more money, simply because their clients imagine being able to blame the female in her motherhood, as though all their own potential crimes against children, are the prostitutes fault.  The other information I was supplied is that: women and girls are forced to engage in prostitution without condoms; and to become pregnant so as to make them more valuable prostitutes; there are doctors surgeries and termination clinics who accidentally fail to perform the operation, or make the referral too late, so as to ensure that forced pregnancies are carried; then after becoming a mother the woman experience being lied about, directly to the department of families, until the child is removed; and then they are forced to prostitute themselves to clients who want to be able to blame a prostitute for their own crimes against children.  The woman I spoke with often, is considerably traumatised, but sustains herself also within considerable dignity in having provided her information to me.  Her memory is becoming worse all the time, and I fear for her safety generally. 

She also supplied me with the information that being homeless in the City of Brisbane, can be made easier by the private security companies, if the homeless person buys drugs from a particular source near or inside of the Roma Street transit station.  The protection thereby available from the security guards is of not being moved on from sleeping locations with protection from rain, and unwelcome strangers.  However, that protection also requires that each homeless person is in a pair, in which there is evidence being supplied that one is raping the other.  I have repeatedly passed on this information to undercover police in the Queensland State police force, whom repeatedly refute that it could be possible; however, once again, subsequent to the election my reports seem to have been becoming taken more seriously.  Obviously it is not possible for me to walk into a police station to provide the sort of circumstantial information which I have received, however I was enabling of the informant to develop her own capacity to be able to provide information to the police, yet she found that to have endangered her considerably among a minority of those other black skin persons who are homeless in the City of Brisbane.  I did try to enable her to rent a room at my house, but she attempted to inform me not to trust her, and let me know that she would not be able to prevent herself from drawing danger upon myself.

Clearly, that such a woman really exists, (and I have introduced her briefly even to my sixteen year old son, such is my high esteem of her self-discipline), indicates that there is far worse occurring among persons whom cannot sustain the discipline and the dignity to evaluate their situation so as to find a person whom can believe them, and inform who else need be informed.  Even the fact that her lifestyle and health are improved upon by living on the street, to when she was receiving some supported accommodation programme assistance, is a fact which ought to cause immediate alarm within the services which provide supported accommodation for women and children at risk.  Why could the existing services not support her?  Within my own observation, she is not really much more effected by the ritual abuse than I have been, yet because she had been a drug user, even though now she has ceased, she was more susceptible financially and socially to habituating the patterns associated with the abuse.  Like myself, regardless of what her actual behaviour has been, she is being branded with all three labels of: insanity; addiction (prostitution and/or drug use); and crimes of abuse against children.  In actual fact, within my own observance, if all crime can be condensed into three factors, those factors are: racial hatred (negative discrimination based on biological appearance only); sodomy (and other violence against the biological function which is disguised as an act of love); and use of addictive (psycho-active) substances to cause the body to generate a larger quantity of certain other substances, and experiences, than is readily able to be taken into responsible account. Over eating and overconsumption in general might even fall into that third category, all forms of discrimination without positive social effect for every person, into the first category, and most sexual abuse into the second category, as having been caused initially by confusion of biological function. (there is no reason to associate dislike of sodomy with homophobia, and most gay men tend to be less inclined towards sodomy than many heterosexual men, partly because the gay community is far better informed about the negative health consequences, but also partly because genuine affection between men, tends not to cause a want to constipate one another)

My writing is mainly based in my own experiences, rather than that of other people’s lives, but as well as general work in inter-cultural communication of religious meaning.  I don’t anticipate being able to make much of a change in the content of my writing, until after my own story has been received by enough persons taking it seriously, so as that I feel correct in having written it.  I have also experienced actual criminal wanting to prevent my writing from having any exposure, since what I have to say on the matter, might, for example, reduce drug sales, or reduce racially based hatred motives.  However the police are far more observant of what it is that I have been writing than criminals are, and most information among criminals about my writing, was being enabled through me providing portions of my writing to the tent embassy.  I want to keep trying to say my piece in the hope of being able to prevent socially and emotionally abusive crimes, and so the police keep on suspecting me within their knowledge that my writing has some Islamic components.  Perhaps the police are worried about an organised crime war being caused by dissemination of certain information publicly, but there is already the evidence that such a sort of thing began due to Labor winning the election, so they ought not brand me with having caused it. 

If organised crime begins a drug related war because less people are buying drugs, then the police might be themselves culpable for actively preventing the criminals proving themselves to be who is carrying the guns, in becoming culpable for not letting youth avoid drug crimes.  Better for the exposed children to fear a criminal with a gun during a time of minor drug related civil unrest, than for children to fear the police.  That point must be made clear.  The comprehension of corruption existing belongs fully in the adult domain, that is until and unless the child already experiences the foundations of legislative justice as unstable.  However that assumes that not every child has a very stable home life, and when a child is living within very stable family responsibilities, political change and civil unrest is not likely to impinge upon the child’s sensibility of right and wrong.  As with every matter of adult comprehension, children need less information, and only that information their own questioning leads to, in which corruption to the legal system is no exception.  However children need accurate answers when they are questioning, as an essential right of the child.  I hope to be able eventually to develop a home school curriculum which teaches the premises of religion within a secular form, and with use of Dreamtime mythology, but is also adaptable to different religions and indigenous cultures.  However I find it almost impossible to apply myself to that task while I have knowledge which needs to be disseminated among the adult population, and among persons with material means to work for social change within the knowledge I have.Thanks for reading all this, I had at first supposed myself able to make it shorter, but my editing is always awry without aid from a male editor.  So thanks to those Aboriginal men who’ve advised me about what to say and what not to, and equitably also the Muslim community. There are just a few more bits of less relevant information to add, only because the rest could go awry without.Thanks for those of you whom have tolerated my company bringing with it police surveillance.  For those who have known me for a long time, and wondered why I was often so oblivious to the policing situation, or wondered why this situation seemed to so suddenly escalate over the past few years, I ought to inform you that I had a constant prolapse of the perineum from mid 1972, until mid 2002, and it was only six months after the recovery of my muscle function that I camped at the tent embassy.  It was never really obvious to me that the police were at all especially attentive to me, (more so than to most of my peers that is) until after the level of surveillance escalated in late 2005.  Which was also after I was first alerted to the situation by an Aboriginal man during 2003.

The reason I believe that the rapist from the rape incident in 2005 could have been a police informant, is mainly because of a couple of close range policing experiences immediately prior to him openly pressuring me with a threat of violence if not acquiescent.  The first was with the bloke I have described elsewhere as the dial-a-crowd dude, (who lets the ferals know what demonstrations to turn up to for kudos not effect, and where smoking drugs might not be investigated) who set about closing down the ‘food-not-bombs’ soup kitchen here in Brisbane, whom I had been volunteering with, but within a pointed assertion that I was myself too difficult to work alongside.  I was later advised from other persons who were also a bit obvious as being within police teams, that he is an acquaintance, and there seems to have become a way of the ASIO men regulating informing me of who they are, (so as I can receive protection from them), by telling me that they know that particular character.  He was eventually quite trusting of me in fact, and I could advise any person whom has already met him in person, to trust him in respect of this matter.   I know that it is a very weird thing to be asserting that there really is a dial-a-crowd organising factor, since most people who go along to political demonstrations are very adverse to any belief in that idea, however, clearly, if there is a real phenomenon, of a group of people who turn up for demonstrations because of being attracted by some factor other than the political stance, then it is more likely to be that policing is behind it than any other explanation. Whether or not I am here supplying any accurate information is for readers to decide upon for them self, of course.

The other policeman I encountered was openly expressing to me that he is an ex-undercover operative.  However he seemed to be English rather than Australian, and I would not be at all surprised if he turned out to be still now an undercover police agent.  He told me the most bizarre story of any person.  He explained that his ‘former’ employees, had experimented with his own physiology by use of drugs and his pattern of masturbation, so as to attempt to replicate the regulation patterns of the physiology of persons with indigenous Australian heritage.  He complained that he had been physically and psychologically abused in the process, and I believe there was an element of truth in his complaint.  However he presented the complaint to me as though against his employers, but when he also intended it to be against indigenous Australians having not given sooner the information about what the physiological difference is, and how it is caused.  (eg, that it is not by sodomy, which is the impression that men whom have been in prison perpetuated a while, based in the fact that indigenous men could perhaps suffer less psychological damage from sodomy than other men are likely to)  The full transaction between us was one in which he lead me astray considerably, and I him, but in which he was genuinely trying to show how far psychologically abused he had been.

The general impression he gave me is that there are enough indigenous Australian men whom are clever enough at manipulating police surveillance teams, so as that the police want to be in on what the deal is with “The Dreamtime”, not as a cultural concept, but in the Aboriginal capacity to regulate dreams to a larger extent than non-indigenous persons can.  From my point of view it is only that there are many Aboriginal persons whom are deft at dodging police surveillance teams, and that the police tend to regard normal intelligence to their work as a sort of super-human power of intelligence.  What ever the case really is, the police have made it their business to find out how they could become the managers of the Dreaming, (and of the Spiritual recovery of Aboriginal Australia from the British invasion?)  The obvious fact is that Aboriginal Australians tend not to hide what that difference really is, and how it is acquired.  The police tend not to have enough real belief in the basic knowledge from Judaism, Christianity, Hinduism, or Islam, from which to build a culturally compatible description of what the reality is, in which the position of indigenous culture, and Religious belief, is that police therefore have no business being interested, as their role is not that of policing our dreams, or our prayers.  If the police were wanting to brand myself as insane for inciting belief in others that their own methodology is inclusive of observance of metaphysics, then what wallies they manifest when it becomes obvious that they have been using occultist practises in their policing.  A significant aspect of the point I am attempting to make, which is far more comprehensible from within Aboriginal culture, and by the police among all those in the mainstream of society, is that they seem to be policing against the agreed upon “Spirit of Reconciliation” which the Liberal-National coalition government signed, when no agreement could be reached about the physical world of materialist concerns.  I can also add that what I am here stating is directly from what I have heard being discussed at Theosophical Society meetings, at which Aboriginal opposition to the government failing to provide a sorry, was defined as though the “Spirit of Reconciliation” was not agreeable to the indigenous community.

 As for the person whom I have identified as a rapist, he had stalked me for at least a few weeks previous, and I had already made one report to the QLD state police at the local station, immediately after which –from just outside the station- another man followed me who told me he was a child pornographer and asked me to join him! That other person happened to be one of the characters who are often why I avoid the food vans which feed the homeless people in the City, and whom tend to be obvious in the fact that police use them to gather their information.  This particular chap however, lives at the Gold Coast, and I had already been covertly threatened by him, one afternoon in King George Square in the City.  During that conversation I lead discussion in the direction of trying to honour the credibility of the mafia, through talking about gangster films, and that alleviated the situations tremendously. However on that first occasion, which was alike to an induction into the City Street organised crime, (necessary if you accept so much as a cuppa soup from the free food vans), he would not let me out of his company until he had “handed me over” into the attention of an Aboriginal governed faction of organised crime, where it is a bit safer for those who can sustain themselves within Aboriginal culture.  I have also subsequently had other conversations with some of the other power brokers in the street, who govern certain interactions which homeless people, and drunks at night in the city, are quite dependent upon.  I also must add that in general, the Queensland State police are doing an excellent job of policing the City, but there are clear difficulties in respect of not many of their undercover agents being able to sustain real cover for long, and so never really finding out the whole story.  Not many police might readily risk themselves by actually living homeless, without contacting other police, for long enough that they might be enabled to find out the real story.  However those whom have done so, are to be commended.  Later to the time described at the start of this paragraph, there were also another few situations when I was followed by the rapist, and on at least one occasion, quite apart from the City context, that same strange bloke from the Gold Coast was hanging around, almost as though a body guard.

I should also add that the processes in which the police have exposed themselves to me, are being managed through the guidance I have received from one specific Aboriginal man, who is not mentioned elsewhere in this document.  He and his family orient within a reputation of vehemently hating white persons, but he owns the story of being a crow who drops its feathers for the swans, so as to make them black, and that allegory is about how to alter the genetic switches enabled through RNA, to engage particular aspects of DNA, and in this case so as to bring out the darker skin pigment genetics in subsequent generations.  I need to mention this because it is just normal self decency for every body reading this to realise that I have been within his protection; and that such protection has been despite the fact that his first approach to me was with the warning that he was instructed to find out if I might be harmful to organised crime and then kill me if so.  That is the correct context in which to place the fact that I am also within ASIO protection.  Just in case it was not obvious, the difficulty is only in that I have been speaking up about what sorts of abuse are common place between prisoners in the prison system.  Perhaps also that I mention the fact that there had been conflict between how ASIO was policing me, and how the State police were policing me, however, since the election seems to have resolved the matter, there is a valid reason to express that such a phenomenon had occurred.  If various police departments cannot functionally align when there is a different political party governing a State to that governing the Commonwealth, then there is a clear necessity for police policy and procedures to be attended to, and perhaps better regulated by legislation.  I do not know if the situation might have even improved upon what it previously could have, because of the resourcing provided within the anti-terrorist legislation, (but perhaps rather than only because I am prepared to highlight that the issue of discrepancy between state and federally funded policing is of real concern, despite ASIO asking me not to, but aligned with what I have earlier informed ASIO of as a potentially a real solution to their difficulties in policing). (I don’t know why they are interested in what my own analysis is.)Overall what I have to say, must include the fact that I am seeking to achieve evidence that some of the policing methodology tends to be causal to what they claim as the reason for their surveillance.  Because of that I will be sending this to a number of persons whom have relative psychological strength, within a branding of a mental illness, which could potentially have first occurred only from not being informed about the distinctions between a Spiritual experience and a health issue.  Not all those persons are of real concern to the police, but many are, and it is an issue which is endemic in the Aboriginal community, and about the regulation of law and order, and the removal of Aboriginal culture’s own sanctions.  Re-defining Aboriginal understanding of communally imposed sanctions such as insanity, has opened doors for persons whom want to attempt to escape being sanctioned. That is using modern definitions and modern interpretations of indigenous culture, in which it is possible to escape the cultural sanctions of the tradition, was until recently an increasing phenomenon, supported by criminals and police alike.  My experience of Aboriginal culture, even in modern city contexts, is that the psychological self discipline anticipated from everybody is indeed a higher level than expected at Buddhist retreats, and more alike to that expected of the men at prayer in Mosque.  I have a real concern that the negative branding of combining Aboriginal culture with Islamic belief is happening and that negative branding could be stimulating law and order problems, yet while portions of the police force were adamant that the combination is tantamount to a breed of the criminally insane, as though their belief in that could lessen crime.  Within this point of view, it has been ASIO and ASIS who have believed in my own intelligence, while Queensland police at first, and the AFP also, tended to regard me as having been rendered infantile by having been ritually abused, and therefore potentially a danger to myself and others.  I have wondered if the AFP were taking advantage of discrepancies of information between ASIO and QLD state police, since the evidence of whom suspects whom for what, seems to indicate that.Apart from my general criticism of the police, that their methodology is potentially psychologically harmful towards persons who are weak willed, and socially harmful to others, I have another area of concern.  It is with respect to the processes by which police informants are selected and treated.  Some individuals among the police seem to be overtly engaging in enabling the same process which happens in prisons, of a trade in reputations.  Eg, if a person is a suspect, then they alleviate that condition only by providing information against another person.  There are a set of police informants, in the city of Brisbane among the homeless, for example, (it being my favourite example, since the City is a relatively safe place, and homeless persons are normally rendered powerless, and yet the social patterns are the same as among more treacherous criminal contexts, such that it is possible to observe what the danger is, within relative safety: eg, if criminals are determined to prove that you are also a criminal and are threatening you to prove yourself bad, best to associate with homeless persons, than with drug dealers, or in brothels, and with fast cars etc.) whom spend all their days collecting any possible hair of an idea of another persons ill intentions, and offer their information to the undercover police who police their whereabouts regularly, as though to ensure their own safety in that way.  The practise causes two distinct problems.  The first is that the informants give information against any body who might offer them a smile, and so innocent persons might become suspects. (eg, you were approachable to a person with a bad reputation, and therefore are bad)  That pattern causes that if the information was provided about a person who was wealthy, it has little impact, but if the information was provided about a person with less money, the impact is hugely negative.  The second problem is worse, that real criminals, engaging in real crimes, are not being policed when they can frame up any other person.  The pattern of letting one person be regarded as less criminal, when they define another persons as a wrongdoer, is the same pattern in which large scale crime such as money laundering occurs; but it is happening within the world of petty crime and youth drug offences (such as the police in the city are very concerned with preventing because of associated sexual violence). 

Overall what I am saying, is not only that there is a genuine complaint in respect of why police have been seemingly regulating my family law situation rather than enabling the courts to, through their mode of policing the situation, but that the patterns of policing which I have subsequently witnessed, include some which are obviously overtly detrimental to the general need for law and order.  I also ought to mention, that in the first instance before the family law case commenced, and when I had a court order in my favour, the Queensland state police made a direct decision not to police that court order, and thus sided with Declan at the outset, in failing to take due notice of the clinical psychiatric evidence available of my good sanity, and respectable motherhood, available on that day, after I rang a psychiatric registrar in Canberra, who faxed a letter to my children’s school, where I was attending for a previously arranged agreement that my children would then begin to start living in my residence for gradually increasing durations, but which Declan had changed his mind about against the then presiding court order.  The children’s school was also so convinced by Declan and Kate that I could be abusive, that they refused to provide me with the children’s reports until I took the matter to the Ombudsman, and the school then sought legal advice from within the department of education, which was obviously at odds with what the school had been informed by Declan.  I guess what is shocking about the whole situation, is that the form of systemic abuse which I am describing, is normally not applied to a person so suddenly, when no such systemic negation of reality had been in place previously.  That is why it is easiest for most persons to dismiss the whole situation as though only my own mental illness, (eg, it would not be so readily dismissed if I was a black person, or a refugee immigrant, etc), but it is also why the actual facts of my experience need to be very carefully evaluated.  How can this have happened to a person within the community of most of my peers?  I hope that this document explains how somewhat.

In respect of the criminal history in my own case, it is all of minor matters, normally not regarded as worth charging; but it has been that my social associations with drug other drug users, that has repeatedly been noted as having caused me to be a suspect.  In the general picture of the social regulation of drug users, the idea of ostracism might be very effective, if only it could be ensured, but it is fairly obvious among drug users, that there are many youths who fall into that world which has been ostracised, and is under the influence of prison conditions, whom might never have become a regular drug user if the situation was less secretive.  Modern Australian prisons have been described to me to be alike to leper colonies of drug users, but at which there are amphetamines being placed into the food, in a pattern which then manifests that the probability of buying drugs which inhibit the effect of the amphetamines becomes inevitable.  That not all inmates arrive with a drug addiction, but all leave with one, is the basic issue.  However, other issues arise, such as those enabled to detoxify their body from an addiction prior to leaving prison, (often through staged release programmes), are usually defined by sustaining a higher status among all prisoners, rather than defined by good behaviour behind bars.  However higher status is more often attuned to who has been an inmate for the longest, and so is most adjusted to the prison social conditions. What that means, is that prison inmates who are released, find it very difficult to stay out of prison, unless they have already accepted full acculturation into the prison way of life.The most important point however is that the regulation of the social status of the drug using communities, is being managed by prison originated processes; in which the branding with identifications of being perpetrators of rape, is the sanction for giving any information to the police about drug sales, or failing to support racial vilification as an excuse for drug use.  Therefore, the issue is manifesting as a larger social issue about child protection, because there are active child rapists who can “buy” the reputation and credibility (as though the lolly wrapper which drugs come in) of any under-protected innocent parent, who might only have happened to have had a conversation with a drug user, and perhaps only one who happens to have been the parent of a child whom her own child befriended, for example.  And then the broader social issue is about how these conditions cause that persons with more money, tend not to be affable in acquaintance with the black community who are more exposed to the situation, and so often the darker skin persons in the Aboriginal community, really struggle just to learn about what normal mainstream social interaction is. Meanwhile in the prisons, it has been through traditional Aboriginal cultural ideals that men have managed to survive with any intact sanity.  But many Aboriginal men are being raped in prisons by persons whom are asserting that their Aboriginality makes them automatically a paedophile in their dreams, and that is the main reason why there ever needed to be any general social concern at this time for the well being of Aboriginal children.I would like to be able to challenge the police, and department of corrective services, and the government, to disprove me, by placing undercover police operatives into the prison system without informing prison employees that any police are present. And last but not least, after these past few years, with only few persons to talk to apart from the occasional former prison inmate who befriends me, and more regular conversations with the undercover police around me, I have a point to make.  The police are in a very strange social situation themselves.  They are normally not enabled to socialise outside of the police force, and so their perceptions of what is the normal way to engage with one another socially, are very tempered by that specific group of persons whom are now working as police, and thus also by the nature of police work.  If we want the police to be able to regulate all of society without finding some innocent behaviour to be suspicious, then we need to let them in on what the whole variety of innocence can manifest.  I actually appreciate the police often enough, and feel safer today than I might, for knowing that they are always nearby, and it is because I expect the police to work in with basic humanitarian considerations for myself and my children, that I can anticipate being within their protection.  Not every Australian child has learned to expect that of the police, which is the essence of the evidence against some of the police methodology.  We can normally also always expect that every child will grow up with a perception that the law courts are obedient to the truth.  I want my own children to learn that it is their basic human right to demand of the court process that the truth will be heard, and that as children they have a very specific right to be represented in this, and for their representations in myself to be attended to, rather than a public servant appointed lawyer whom has not met them and had not read the evidence that I might be speaking truthfully on their behalf.  I believe that their basic safety in society depends in part on knowing that there is a unanimity of social belief in what comprises a decent upbringing; and that is why I am making my self so open to scrutiny in the points of view I express in this document.  Obviously in this, I am going to be scrutinised by a very disparate total set of persons, ranging from family, through police, into left wing organisations, social justice organisations, traditional Aborigines, and Muslims.  Apart from the fundamental human rights issues, it is really quite normal in contemporary society to anticipate that a person with the sort of affiliations I might have, will be observed by the police, and I have always been accepting of their surveillance on that basis, and without complaint until only as recently as writing this document.

This document might yet receive another few edits, so if you would like to leave comments advising me about how it ought to be edited, then please go ahead.  I will keep a copy of every edit.  Also let me if you didn’t ‘get it’ and want me to tell you what I meant.  You can either write to me at PO Box 6113, Fairfield, QLD 4103, or send an e-mail to curaezipirid@yahoo.com.au, and also stay tuned with this website either doyouknowme.wordpress or doyouknowabout.blogspot for any information about when I ever get my book of poetry published, or try at www.lulu.com to see if there is any thing worth buying and paying for shipping to Australia.  Some of the poetry goes hand in hand with the fuller yarn about the prisons, but most of it is not yet well edited enough as of January 2008. 

 If you have been hearing rumours about me, then please try to validate for yourself what the reality is; and know that I would appreciate hearing about what sort of rumours there are around, as most, to my knowledge, are readily dismissible as malicious in origin. However such rumours seem to be only to be expected surrounding every person whom at all associates with any former prison inmate, no matter how minor the crime, how repentant the perpetrator, and how innocent the associate.

Just to recap here, in that way which people who are assumed to be insane, tend to repeat ourselves over and over again: I need to say that the current medical evidence around my sanity, is a very positive reflection on my capacity to recover fully, in respect of my treating psychologist and other persons whom have had longer contact with me.  However the forensic psychiatrist appointed by the court has attempted a “probable” upgrading of my diagnosis into a “probable” paranoid form of schizophrenia, which is the diagnosis I have always opposed.  Apparently the paranoia is a refection of me being totally delusional about there ever having been any actual allegation of child sexual abuse against me.  That is despite an earlier forensic psychiatric report, by Dr Barbara McGuire, having written of  my ex-, Declan Grimes, belief that he would be able to ask the police to charge me with child sexual assault based in what he already knew then in 2004, (my children had then been for one year with him), and in that Declan spoke to her without concern that he could be lying or himself deluded, despite him having describe himself as recovering from alcohol abuse, without giving up alcohol consumption.  The later report from Dr Tod Wakefield seems to have disregarded the earlier report in all its evidence of Declan’s status, but not of my status.  However, because there is an issue now of legal conjecture about my sanity from an expert witness, (which will be readily able to be disproved once Dr Wakefield is on the stand in court and asked to define my diagnosis against the accepted medical DSM IV parameters), I have been warned that the police might try to define my wondering about their surveillance as though clear evidence of paranoia, and that my parents are more likely to accept the police definition than my own, is that sadder truth.  (a truth in which the police also hold my parents to be at fault)  It is my express position in this, that if the police try to assert that I am paranoid, they would then prove themselves overtly to be stooping to the exact same methodology as is in organised crime, and is being taught to men in the prisons as a way of covering up drug dealing. 

It is one thing to believe that you need to be able to think like a crook to catch a crook, but another altogether to use criminal methodology so as to vindicate the genuine mistakes within the legislative justice system.  Frankly I do not care what opinions are held in the mainstream about my mental health, except as that might have been hindering me from attending to my children’s needs. However, when I was actually unwell during 1999, there was no insinuation that I might not be the best person to continue in the full time care of my children, and I have never since then been in such bad mental health again.  Therefore I would like to caution everybody not to assume any fact about my mental health until it has been more properly thoroughly investigated by the sort of expert who is a skilled clinician, and not inclined to exaggerate my perception of criminality in the community, as though a reflection on my own capacity for law abidance.  I tend to believe also, that there might be some worth in having a few biological tests done around my brain chemistry patterns to test the basic biological function against what is more usual.  This is because I know that my level of anadamide, (the neuro-transmitter which THC replicates) is naturally extremely high, and potentially there is also a high level of some of the other neuro-transmitters and endorphins, since my physical sensitivity in respect of diet etc, is quite high consistently.  (no depressed bits, just always full on, over the top, weird intensity of concentration, followed by deep sleep at night)

Thanks again for reading this.  Partly thanks is due since I am sure that nobody really wanted to know about why there might have been a political motivation under the Liberal-National coalition government, to keep a specific place in international relations, by branding the combination of indigenous Australian cultural belief, and Islam, as criminal insanity.  But it’s a place in international relations which places Australian outside of security council likelihood for sure; and Labor possibly would not be able to hold power for long if they keep up the same face which tends to presuppose that Australian political power will always slide back to the Liberal/National coalition; but also tends to have Australia’s international reputation branded as abusers of Human rights.  That’s a large set of political assertions I have just made, without providing the reasoning, so only keep on reading if you want to know the reason in which I can assert this.

Just in case you want a why now, all that I really know, is that certain factors had converged towards causing that the existing indigenous form of Islam (in which Shari’ah is the same as “True Law” etc) prevalent in all of the tropics, and further south in most places also, since conversion of belief predates conversion by active Jihad in most of Australia: became to be regarded as potentially only a form of nazi style politics. 

(unlike the Native Americans whose indigenous culture is less able to expose the weaknesses involved with capitalist accumulation: in which it is assumed that the native Americans will fulfil Islamic prophesy; which the Masonic temples believe in also, since their foundations are from the crusades and a secret conversion to Islam of many of the crusaders, which is well documented by Muslims; but and which belief has caused many contemporary Masons, especially the Rosicrucian craft lodges within the broader definitions of Freemasons, to count their eggs before they were hatched, by presuming to be able to impose fulfilment of prophesy upon Native Americans)-(no, hang on, that is just how the argument goes which is often being posed nowadays between Muslims, but I should not be making it publically since there is suspicion that it could contain seditions affiliations)

The plain facts of the matter are that Indigenous Australian Islam is a far more peaceful process of undergoing an internal mental Jihad in which the part of the personality which is an accountable and responsible individual, must win out over the part of the personality which wants to go along with what everybody else is about. However, in the long and the short of it, War has its causes originally, as defined in the essence of Religious method, in preventing child abuse, and thereby those American Braves really might be onto something that Australian indigenous people have been failing in:- oh no, but then if that is true, I might really be inciting civil unrest, so I have to confess that I really believe that Aboriginal Australia has a normative process of internal mental Jihad which is less violent, and most often today visible through drunks fighting on the street.

How Islam among Aboriginal Australians came originally to be branded as a form of Nazi style politics, might be a bit more of a mysterious matter; or perhaps it is only that real neo-Nazis in organised crime conspired to have us all tricked into preventing Indigenous Islam, since they realise that such a belief pattern could reduce drug sales, reduce victimisation in the indigenous, and the general, population; and possibly also reduce other social phenomenon which are anti-labour.

If anybody is at all interested in learning more about these ideas, I can gladly provide information for accessing necessary information; or a copy of a manuscript for a book which I have drafted which includes some poetry in need of editing, as well as a long essay about the issues.  The manuscript costs me about $13 to produce, and I usually ask about $25 for a copy.  Even though it still needs some editing, there is a copy at the National library already, and also at the AIATSIS library.  There are a couple of other copies getting about in the indigenous community as well; but perhaps I will need not to make it a larger print run publication for the sake of preventing the police worrying too much about me, in respect of my children.

Indigenous belief in combination with Islam, is actually a very individually and personally empowering belief system, able to combat many forms of susceptibility to identifying with falsehoods.  I have some other work begun also, which is an endeavour to produce a book that provides a secular look in on the belief structure, and which the police were assiduous at preventing me keeping even any copies of in the first attempts at drafting.  However for the benefit of those whom have only ever known organised religion as right wing and oppressive, (I can confess that perhaps much of Islam is that also), if you want the basics of Islamic belief, it begins with defining God as not what you could ever suppose, and everything decent in life, and as a higher source of energy than any body could possibly sustain the capacity to comprehend.  (funny how believing that enables individuals to increase their own energy levels)  Then the next essence in Islam, is that of accepting that Mohammed spoke the truth, and that he ought not be expected to be the sole bearer of the burden of what he spoke.  Especially in light of the science and technology which Qur’an originally enabled.  Basically the argument is that the more of us who can recognise the burden in which Mohammed spoke, then either the more of us acquire bizarrely empowered frames of reference, or the more of us can influence the whole pattern of human society into scientific socialism, or the more of us might be badly policed, and all of the above.  I know it doesn’t seem especially commendable from most perspectives.

I will also here paraphrase myself in an even more secular way now. (Be aware that use of Islamic concepts here, and in most secular contexts, is without association to the personality of Mohammed, whom Muslims are committed to enabling that he not be singularly responsible for his prophesy). If religion is the opium of the masses, then most people are saying “give me religion above drug addiction any day”, and I agree, since I don’t know of any of my socialist friends and acquaintances, or anybody else today, who always goes without any analgesic substances, even if its only overeating and never letting our kidney’s a proper chance to clean the whole blood supply.  Further more, I can say about Islam, the fact being, (and here at risk of being duped an apostate of Islam by the Islamic mainstream, which is a status that nobody wants), Qur’an could be summed up in the following: it tells us to mind that there are bloody bums, buggers, and bastards in the world, and that their methods are permanently dastardly and need be prevented; explains what that method is; names that we must not ourselves use the same method in retaliation; then defines that if we find our selves having been unconsciously entrapped into that method, better that we accept the same level of accountability being applied to the bloody bums buggers and bastards who did it to us, and that within that experience, we might learn better how to ensure that we can hold the bad guys accountable to us; but of course accountable to us, can only be accountability through Allah, defined as all that is life sustaining, (and mind bogglingly incomprehensible).  In essence it is not a dangerous theory, but an enabling psychological process. 

There are short cuts in the psychology being enabled for those whom find themselves able to believe in Angels, or the Djinn, or even the Wandjina of Aboriginal mythology, and actually even those who have had dreams of Alien visitations, all are attuning to the greater collective subconscious of Islam.  (Gurdjieff’s work utilised the idea of equating Angels with Aliens, and explains that within an Islamic framework of understanding the function of the Devil).  The warning attached to all of the allegorical tales which divulge aspects of Islamic theory, as with all religions, is that if you fail to believe in the whole, then you had no right accessing any of.  I can though, categorically define, that the “chosen people” or the “people of the book”, (which is what the war in the middle east is over), are defined in Islam, Christianity, and Judaism, to belong to every nation and land; so there is no cause for any dispute.  Religious politics tend to get nastier faster than other politics, simply because Religions all rely upon an older initiation tradition which enables the person being initiated to attain knowledge of the inevitability their own death, and that truth is scary. But since the whole rest of religion can be condensed into teaching about sustaining life and health, it sort of pans out beneficial for each individual who is open to learning the process of religion.  No mystery, just nitty gritty nasty knowledge being cushioned considerably, and yet that the world still can’t be fully defined by human scientific enquiry, leaves the mystery in place as more irrefutable.  If I did not enjoy the intelligent contemplation of religious method, I would not be a believer.

Meanwhile, I reckon everybody ought to be wondering upon why my friend, who had asked me to marry him recently, and I turned down since I am not ever likely to marry a set up to engage in clandestine racial hatred as though it is the basis of empowerment, and whom is a well respected member of the local Aboriginal community, when once he won a legal case against the Ku Klux Klan, here in Australia, had the experience of the American KKK leader being flown out to Brisbane to greet him, and apologise, and explain that the contemporary KKK do not engage in lynching blacks, just merely supply racial based motives for whites.  I had to stop and wonder why my friend had accepted the visitation. But as I have refused marriage to him, it might be none of my business.

Regardless of which, the plain fact is, that the actual biological difference between darker skin complexion and lighter, includes a variety of components which are sustained mainly by the liver, and within the full set of differences, it is factually the case, that most, not all but most, darker skin persons tend to be likely to be able to sustain self respect and certainty in their own innocence, when exposed to being blamed, than most white persons are biologically equipped for.  It is also compatible to say that black skin persons are more sensitive to the appearance of subtle factors which illustrate identification, yet thereby also more sensitive to errors of identification, and more adept and minimalist at the internal mental dialogues which can prevent false identification.  White persons are more likely to be culturally inclined to work towards avoiding situations of being falsely blamed, thereby.  Within that fact, (which white and black persons ought to ask one another about before denying as biased), since there is evidence of black skin persons having been behaving as though in agreement with assertions of black racism towards white skin persons: we all need to seriously consider how extremely emotionally, physically, and psychologically abusive, the set up of black indigenous Australians, to make them seem to be who has been at fault for racial discrimination, and stolen generations, etc, really has been.

Finally if there is anybody reading this who wishes that I might be prevented from writing such documents: the most expedient way to enable that would be for my children to be returned safely into my custody, daily care, and residence.  In 2003, before I was told by my oldest son that his father was being violent, and that he would rather be living almost anywhere else, which was two weeks before the Queensland police sided with my sons father against me; my strongest concerns for my children’s well being were in respect of the fact that nobody was reading them to sleep at night every night.  While I knew that the situation was not ideal, there was no expectation on my part that it would continue for long enough that the children might feel hurt, or be put at risk.  Also I cannot fathom why or how Declan and Kate so suddenly became so determined to keep my children, when the immediately previous time the children had visited them in Brisbane, I had to have an argument with Kate to impose on her that she had to agree.  I cannot sustain belief that they really wanted, or want, to be the residential care givers for my children.  So what is happening and why would the justice system here in Queensland not recognise my formerly excellent reputation in motherhood.  Clearly, if my children had not been removed from my care without need, no such document as this would have been written, and the issues mentioned in it would not be getting exposure as they are now.  I can categorically say that there are persons involved with organised crime here in Brisbane, who set out to assert themselves as intending to find out what my problem is so as to resolve this particular issue, but whom, within that, attempted to cause themselves that the situation manifest in a way that enables themselves to mask their own ill mindedness towards law, as though it might be only my own fault for being a bad mother.  I don’t believe I need to make the sort of threats normally associated with crime, but I have had dreams of a couple of individuals involved dying nasty deaths of rapidly developing cancers.  Though it ought not ever need be said.

That’s all for now, so thanks

Rebecca Copas


That was then

This is now

But in between how

Became what found

For to know

Might I never be too slow

In connecting with ancestral dreaming

The story unbroken to follow

Between then our land

Held by black nomads grand

And now upon white money

Borrowing upon tomorrow not funny

When one day our will

Recognised strong still

Will return this land’s real

Promise of yesterday’s every tomorrow

So remember this true

We are here not by what we once maybe did do

But because of our capacity

To accept daily responsibility

For life giving principals

Only the best in our immediate environment to renew


And Alaykumuassalamu’ waramathuallahi’wabarakathuaha



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